


A Kekkei Genkai Worth Preserving

by theFateofYou



Category: Naruto
Genre: Aged-Up Character(s), Alternate Universe - Arranged Marriage, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Arranged Marriage, Canon-Typical Violence, Character Death Fix, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Konohagakure | Hidden Leaf Village, Multiple Endings, Multiple Pairings, Non-binary Reader - Freeform, Not Canon Compliant, Other, Post-Fourth Shinobi War, Post-Naruto Time Skip | Naruto Shippuden, Reader-Insert, Self-Indulgent, Sorry Not Sorry, before boruto, this really is for my own enjoyment
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-03-03
Updated: 2020-07-21
Packaged: 2021-02-27 20:13:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 7
Words: 23,966
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22951573
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theFateofYou/pseuds/theFateofYou
Summary: (y/n) is the last remaining member of the Dotan clan, possessing a unique Kekkei Genkai that the hokage cannot afford to be lost. With this in mind, and with (y/n) returned from a long escort mission, the concept of an arranged marriage is proposed. With several contenders for their hand.This is really, just my own self indulgent fic that I've wanted to write. Hopefully you guys like it too
Relationships: Aburame Shino/Original Non-Binary Character, Aburame Shino/Reader, Hyuuga Neji/Original Non-Binary Character, Hyuuga Neji/Reader, Inuzuka Kiba/Original Non-Binary Character, Inuzuka Kiba/Reader, Nara Shikamaru/Original Non-Binary Character, Nara Shikamaru/Reader, Uchiha Itachi/Original Non-Binary Character, Uchiha Itachi/Reader
Comments: 124
Kudos: 240





	1. Finally Home

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You return home after years away, only to learn you are being called upon once again to fufill your duty.

Home had never looked so beautiful. The faces of the previous hokages watching over the mix of bright green leaves and orange roofs. Welcoming you home after so long away. Sariutobi's face now graced that, wide mountain side and much had changed since you had left. Some old buildings now gone, and new ones built near them. You had only heard of the village's fate through letters and quiet meetings as you escorted a princess through the Land of Flowers for the past two years; both a bodyguard and an envoy for the village. At long last, you had been called home. 

It sounds like it had been one hell of a time. Sarutobi died, and Tsunade now sits in a position of shared leadership with Kakashi. The akatsuki rose and fell, and the Uchihas were brought back into the fold. Another great war began, the dead rose and slept again, and the war was ended. Yet, they never called you back. In fact, you were warned to keep both yourself and the princess hidden away from the war. Even, in all their turmoil, you were told to remain hidden. That, of all things, even in a war, someone with your ability was considered too valuable to lose.

It made you wonder, why they were calling you back now, during a time of peace and prosperity. Perhaps another mission to send you away. You were going to find out soon enough. The hokage wanted a full report of your mission, but you sensed it was more than that. It would have been easy enough to keep you hidden away with the princess, until your clan grew in size. 

Ah yes, your clan. The fifth great clan of the Hidden Leaf. The Dotan clan had been reduced to only two members; much like the Uchihas in that regard, though from what you heard more and more Uchihas kept popping up out of nowhere. Yours, was only the two. Yourself, and your grandmother, whom despite all trials was still very much alive. The two of you, the only remaining people to carry along the kekkei genkai that had led to your family's demise a near decade ago. A genetic talent, that allowed the Dotans to conduct chakra. Stealing chakra from one source, and then send it back out; either in a massive, concussive blast or to replenish the chakra of a teammate. It has its limits, being a conduit for too long or for too much tended to fire your nerves and leave you bed ridden.

The use outweighed the risks. You had yet to lose to an opponent, nor any of the people you assisted in combat.

With those, long memories still swirling in your mind, you began the descent down into the village. It was different, but still very much the same. You remembered every turn in the road, every corner store that remained was a welcomed memory of childhood. A few people even recognized you, or at least, recognized the flowing purple and black tabard that fell down to your ankles; two, long slits on each side that ran up to your hip, tied with a bow. Your whole family wore a similar colour, it was the easiest thing to remember. You gave the old strangers a wave, and continued to the hokage's office. 

"Ah, (y/n). You arrived sooner than expected." Tsunade smiled, closing a folder and leaning on the desk. You only knew of the woman, she was a lot younger than you had expected. You nodded, giving both her and Kakashi (who was only just waking from a nap on the window sill) a short bow, "I was eager to be home. I can't believe six years have gone by so quickly."

"The leaf village is happy to have you back (y/n) though your vacation will be short lived I'm afraid."

"I assumed as much, or you would never have brought me back in the first place." you laughed softly, folding your hands flat against your waist. It was a constant effort to not bounce on your toes, working to meet her eyes. The longer silence built between the two of you, the more nervous she made you. What was it with leaders and that undying, cold stare that could kill a man?

You took the moment to sit down, smoothing the tabard's skirt; bouncing your fingers against your knees before willing them still. You could feel her eyes, even as you looked over to Kakashi who seemed less than entertained by the conversation. "Really Tsunade? Right now? She's still worn from walking and you want to talk about her engagement?"

"En-Engagement?!" You stuttered, releasing the fabric from between your fingers. You snapped your gaze back to Tsunade, but she refused to meet your eyes. Her sudden, hidden gaze, only confirmed Kakashi's words. You knew your summoning was related to your ability but...you never imagined this! Your engagement was to be handled by your grandmother, unless...unless this was her idea.

The chair fell back as you stood up quickly, and you caught the edge of it with your foot before it could fall. "Do I have no say in this? My grandmother swore here word that the decision would be mine, and now I'm being married off? Well then, who'd you pick? Is it some bastard outside of the village? Or some old man who wants to use my family's ability for his own gain?"

There was no faulting you for being angry. Of all the things to bring you back for, an arranged marriage was the worst ending. Made no better that now neither of them would meet your gaze. Leaving you glaring from one face to the other. You slammed the chair down flat, "Answer me! Why have you stolen my freedom so carelessly?"

"Enough butterfly!" 

You whirled as you recognized that voice. But ten minutes ago, you would have cried. Six years without seeing your grandmother was a hard thing, but now you only felt anger. She was certainly involved in this. Grandmother stood just under five feet as she shuffled into the office, her cane clacking against the stone. She wore the same tabard as you, the dark purples and blacks dragging on the floor as she slouched over to accommodate her age along with a pair of comfy black trousers. Lucky woman. Grandmother hobbled over and whacked your shin with her cane. For all your training, it still hurt like a bitch and you winced; gripping your leg. "What do you mean enough! This is your doing as well, someone explain what is going on and who I am so now betrothed!" 

"No one yet you quick tongued fool!" she snapped, whacking you over the head as you bent down to her eye level. "But to be decided in the coming months. I'm old, and you're only getting older. The clan needs new blood, and there are many suitable families in the area. Uchiha, Hyuuga, or even some of the smaller ones. They all have fine sons."

You couldn't formulate the words. It was like you were being auctioned off to the best suited. You opened your mouth to make some noise of protest, but Tsunade finally spoke. 

"It isn't ideal, but your family's kekkei genkai is extremely dangerous and valuable. We cannot risk it being lost. As such, we put out a notice to all of the other clans within the Hidden Leaf Village. Many of them have put forth their eligible children, all of whom you will be meeting at the betrothal dinner. Its an old tradition and law, but one that the Hokage is still able to enact."

"Is that...why...Betrothal dinner?" You questioned, sinking back into your chair, before standing again; your grandmother glaring at you, and taking the chair instead. She gave a happy sigh as she sat down, before further explaining, "Apologies Hokage, Tsunade. They have always been quick tempered. Now, listen. The betrothal dinner is where you will be presented as available for an arranged marriage. There, you will meet the different suitors and from among them I will pick my favourites; usually four or five. From that point, you will live with them in a private residence. After three months time, you will decide whom you will marry. See butterfly, you do have a choice."

"That's not the kind of choice I meant! This is...ridiculous! You can't just...make me marry one of them!" you fumed, tapping your hands against your waist in that quick, agitated fashion. You were to be married off, and have children, with one of the people your grandmother saw fit. Simply because of a kekkei genkai. This was, insanity!

"We can. The hokage has ordered it, and I have consented to it. You will do as your duty foretells, and begin the tradition. Your duty as a ninja and as a member of this clan demands it." she snapped, whacking you with her cane again. Grandmother rose, giving the hokage a bow, "I will see them ready for tonight. You honour us with this sacred tradition."

She grabbed your hand, guiding you from the room. You were too stunned to even speak. If you refused this...this mission. Then you would be no better than an exiled ninja. If you wanted to remain a part of your home and family, you would...have to follow through with this. You nearly fell down the winding stairs as your grandmother guided you. Barely registering her words, until she gently squeezed your hand. "I know...that this is not what you wanted. Especially so young. But there are many fine young men to be at the dinner. You may find some happiness in that. Or at least be in misery with the young men being forced into this as well."

"Grandmother...I didn't...want...to marry like this. I knew I would have to...but this is so soon. I have only just returned, I barely even know who these men are now. Let alone how to even marry any of them." you muttered, feeling your lip quiver. Grandmother paused, and you braced for a cane whack but instead she wrapped her frail, chilly arms around you in a hug. "I know dear. Take solace that you are helping your clan survive. That there will be generations of the Dotan after you because of you."

"I will...try." you mumbled, consenting to this process. It was a terrible situation, and you barely knew the men you would soon be courted by. Still, you had to have faith that you were doing this for a good reason. Maybe, you could even be friends with your future husband. Still, the idea of living in a house with several suitors, just for the purpose of a future marriage did seem a bit...forced. Traditions could be strange. You cleared your throat, and followed grandmother down the stairs, "I suppose I won't be on any missions. What about the...the suitors?"

You had to force the words out. 

"They will still be sent out on missions, as is their duty. This marriage is your current duty. Living together will give you a chance to find whom you live best with, and will protect you from any...future attacks. We cannot risk the men who...who..."

She trailed off, but you knew what she spoke of. The men who had murdered your clan a decade ago. Only you and grandmother had managed to survive, having been out shopping the day it had occurred. To this day, you both remember the blood soaked streets of the Dotan estate. Every man, woman, person, and child had been murdered. Bloody and in pieces. Despite extensive searching, you had never learned who ordered the attack. Both you and your grandmother had lived in fear of a return. Hence why you had been sent away, and your grandmother watched by the ANBU ever since. You squeezed her hand and nodded, "I understand, lets go home. I have missed the place, and I'm sure you have a lot of prep work."

Grandmother cleared her throat, giving a smile and a nod. "Oh yes I do. Look at your hair! Its all tangled! And there's mud all over your tabard. And are those leaves stuck in your belt? What did you do? Fight a tree?"

You smiled at the banter, continuing the rest of the way home. Your grandmother took back alley after back alley; wanting to avoid any of the possible suitors from seeing you before she had a chance to put you in a bath. Part of you knew they were probably just as busy as you, getting ready for the big banquet tonight. There was nothing grandmother loved more than etiquette and lessons, and she was about to give you the biggest rehearsal of your life. 

The Dotan estate was unchanged from when you had left. High walls with purple shuttered windows built in. The roof of the building peaking up over the walls. The only thing changed was that now the ANBU sat atop the wall, and only the main building was occupied. The rest having been abandoned, no one left to take care of them. As you entered the estate, you could see a few people moving around in one of the old homes; where your great aunt had lived. They must have been preparing it for your future suitors.

The inside of the main house was much like any other home within the village. Your grandmother was a stickler for tradition. Tatami mats, bamboo plants and calligraphy decorating each room, etc. She wasn't a fan of those, new fangled devices as she put it. Even your own room was unchanged, the bed freshly made and a tub of water waiting on the enclosed balcony; grandmother always believed a cold bath would keep you young.

"Now get in! The water is nice and cold, and scented with jasmine. Then, lots of peach tea, and then we will get to the manners for the banquet. I can't imagine some minor princess helped you remember your etiquette. Then we will have you all dressed up, I picked out a beautiful kimono. Not to feminine, not to masculine, it will suit you perfectly."

You smiled, grateful that she still remembered that and your pronouns. In this house, we respect nonbinary rights.

"Now get in! Its only getting colder!" she teased, and walked away. Yelling for one of her maids to come help her with the stares and to boil the tea.

You sighed, slowly stripping the layers of leather, thin mesh, and fabric til the cold air brushed over your skin. The balcony faced the Nara woods, giving you privacy as you sunk into the icy water. Steeling your nerves so that only a hard hiss left your mouth. Small flowers floated in the water, clinging to your skin and hair; leaving the familiar smell of flowers all over you. You looked out off the balcony, leaning on the tub edge to admire the forest. 

How many times had you dreamed of these woods? Of this balcony. Enjoying the air as it brushed over your skin, rippling the water. The song of birds filling your ears and bringing a soft, sense of peace to you. No matter the circumstances of your return, you were happy to be home. You couldn't say you were happy about the idea of an arranged marriage. It was an outdated tradition, but you supposed it would have to be done. You would have had to marry soon anyway, to save your clan. You always promised you would, no matter what. This was just the sped up process of that. 

Who knows, maybe you would actually like some of the suitors. You remembered some of them vaguely. The lazy Shikamaru, never wanting to work. Or how odd Shino was. Neji was another choice, now fully recovered from the past violence. You even knew that Itachi had returned to the clan, his work for the hokage revealed and been accepted back into the clan. Or maybe it was going to be Naruto. Even worse, the ever brooding Sasuke. Now that was a disaster waiting to happen. You prayed your grandmother had some sense. Who knows, maybe they had all improved, made themselves better...or they could be exactly the same.

You grabbed the soap scrub, rubbing the lather into your skin to remove the dark and dead cells. A sudden flash of birds, scattered out of the forest. You froze, eyes darting to the source of the disturbance. Barely able to make out the figure on the tree line, watching the estate...watching you. You splashed out of the tub, grabbing a kunai out of the pile of clothes and whipping it towards the figure but it was already gone. You ran to the balcony edge, grabbing a towel and yelled to the ANBU on the walls, "There was someone watching on the forest side!"

It was enough to send one of them running in that direction, the other climbing up the balcony to your side. You pulled the towel around you as he spoke, "Are you alright (y/n)?"

You nodded, turning your eyes to the forest as though the figure might reappear. It wasn't a coincidence. Seeing someone on the forest edge, on the day you had just returned. "I'll feel better if the man is caught. Assassin or pervert alike."

"Don't you worry. We'll keep you and your grandmother safe." he reassured, tilting his head. You gave another nod, "Thank you...do you...have a name I can address you by? You and your friend?"

You heard him laugh, rubbing the back of his head, "Ah, you can call me Tenzo, and my friend is Iki. We've been watching your grandmother for awhile, so don't you worry."

"Well, thank you, Tenzo." You knew it wasn't his real name. He couldn't tell you, or anything else about him. A silent, watching voice. You could hear his smile, and you were about to speak again. Not liking the awkward silence building between you, but your grandmother came to your rescue. Gasping as she saw your, towel covered form and the ANBU balancing on the balcony. "A scandal! No! Back you go tree man! They are not to be seen by any man before the banquet! Especially not like this! There is so much to be done!"

You could hear her building her way up into a rant, but Tenzo quickly ended it. "No worries ma'am. I'm with ANBU, I don't think I count. Plus, your child spotted a figure on the forest line so we are just making sure everything is alright."

Grandmother tensed, and you padded over to her side. You took the robe out of her hands, slipping it on over the towel. Tenzo took the hint and climbed down the balcony, leaving the two of you in the near empty room. "I can't leave you alone for ten minutes. Come on, there is much to be done."

\-------------------------------------------------  
_At the Nara Residence_

"Man this is such a drag! A competition for one girl? Why do I have to go? Don't we have an unmarried uncle?" Shikamaru groaned, trying to focus on the floor as his mother tried to comb the spikes of hair into something presentable. He looked over to his father, who was half way through reading out the basic etiquette for the banquet. "We were asked by the hokage. We have to put someone forward and you're the closest in their age range. If you keep acting like that, the Dotan head won't pick you. So just listen up."

"Its still a stupid tradition. I barely even remember (y/n), now they're being married off? Sucks more for them than for me I guess." he huffed, but tilted in to listen. It was easier to just listen and get this over with. He could hardly imagine what the poor person was going through. Only just returning home and now being thrown into a whole other hell. He had always intended to get married, this would be an easier way of doing it.

\-----------------------------------------------  
_At the Aburame Residence_

"It is very important that you impress the grandmother Shino. It will be her first impression that will decide whom the heir will live with for the coming months." Shibi explained, passing a cleaned pair of shades back over to Shino. The man nodded, putting them in place. He simply nodded, not many words were lost between the two. He had only volunteered so his younger brother wouldn't get involved. He would have much preferred to remain single, focus on his work. Still, it shouldn't be too much trouble. Meet the person, get them to like him, and give the Dotan's some heirs. Nothing requiring too much emotional attachment. He could do that. 

\-----------------------------------------------  
_At the Inuzaka Residence_

"What?! No way!" Kiba growled, dodging as his mother tried to steal the dirty, fur covered coat off of him. Running in circles around the table.

"Oh yes you will! You will do this one thing and behave for fuck sake!" she growled, grabbing the hood and yanking it off him, "And you will look nice doing it!"

"I don't want to marry them!"

"Its not up to you! Its up to the grandmother. If you keep this up, I'll never have any grandchildren!"

"I heard you! Give me back my coat!"

"NO!"

\-----------------------------------------------  
_At the Hyuuga Residence_

"You understand that there is no room for error in this?" 

"Yes sir." Neji confirmed, still yet to rise from the bow he was in. "I will convince the Dotan heir to marry me, and we will add her family as an ally to our own. Bringing strength and honour to the Hyuugas."

"Know that we only allow this because I have had only daughters. If there was anyone else, you would continue your work as a guard. Be grateful for this honour."

"Of course sir. Thank you." Neji gritted his teeth, straightening as he was dismissed. Heading out. He remembered (y/n), quick tempered even when nervous. It wouldn't be easy, but he would do as duty called.  
\----------------------------------------------  
_At the Uchiha Residence_

"You're seriously going to do this Itachi!" Sasuke fumed, slamming his hands down on the table. Itachi nodded calmly, pulling his hair back into a neat ponytail. He turned to where Sasuke was, listening for the sound. "The hokage extended the offer, and we have much to do if the Uchiha's are ever to rebuild from where they once were. To work with the Dotan is a great start."

"But you're just getting back on your feet! You can barely even see!" the man protested, "When will you start thinking about yourself and not duty!"

"Enough Sasuke, I've made up my mind."


	2. We Humbly Present

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The night of the banquet begins, with as many shenanigans and awkward moments as you can imagine.

"Grandmother! You're going to pull my hair out!" you whined as she yanked the greased comb through your hair. Smoothing it further back into the traditional, elaborate style. Already your head felt heavy with the pinned flowers and links of coins; an elabroate headdress still waited at your side, and you dreaded having to put it on. Grandmother whacked your arm gently, pulling the comb through once more before pushing it into the back of the design to hold it all in place; only a few loose strands curled over your cheeks and brow. You watched her pick up the head piece and sighed, holding your head still so it wouldn't turn up lopsided. "I understand its traditional to have a nice dinner, but this feels like a bit much."

"No no, we want them to understand your importance! This is symbolic of your value as a member of the clan!" she chided, pulling you up to your feet. The dark purple of the ceremonial kimono swished around your ankles, a pattern of cherry blossoms dancing across the silk. Grandmother had left your face bare, and despite how uncomfortable it all felt, as you looked in the mirror you felt beautiful. Feeling like one of the figures that had stepped out of a painting and taken your place. Grandmother motioned for you to bend down, holding a silk purple veil in her hands, "Final touches."

You knelt down, allowing her to pin the thin silk into your hair; the fabric propped up slightly by the other hair pins, letting it flutter just in front of your face and not on it. You could still see, but the world was tinged purple and patterned with the design made in the fabric. You took Grandmother's hand, straightening back up now that you were ready. You watched as Grandmother pinned a veil over her own face, no longer able to make out her expression. "Remind me again why the veil is necessary. You'd think they'd want to know what I look like, its been years since I saw any of them."

"They are here to marry you for your talent and ability, not your face." she explained, and you both began to walk to the banquet pavilion. You understood her meaning. This marriage wasn't about you, but about your family. You were simply the currency of its worth. They did not need to know who you are. Grandmother squeezed your hand, and gave a sly smile, "Its also so that way we can laugh or sneer at the suitors without anyone seeing. We don't want to offend anyone, nor express our interest. Can't have them thinking more about themselves."

You could agree with that cynicism. Squeezing your grandmother's hand once more before you were greeted by the masked ANBU. While the distance between the main house and the pavilion was but an open walkway away, they wanted to escort you there. Still on guard when they failed to catch the mysterious watcher from earlier. Tenzo and Iki gave a short bow before stepping behind you and Grandmother. The walkway itself was elevated slightly above the ground, a small pond full of paper lanterns rippling underneath and illuminating you all as you walked. Even from here, you could hear the hum of conversation from the pavilion. Nervous and quiet. Waiting...for you.

You felt like butterflies were being forced down your throat with every step closer. You pulled your hand from your grandmother's, sliding your hands into the opposite sleeve and folding them against your waist. So many people were waiting for you, so much riding on your success this evening. The entirety of your clan's survival, resting on your silk clad shoulders. You nearly jumped out of your sandals as Tenzo whispered in your ear, "Deep breathes, I don't know how to write a report about you fainting from nerves. You've faced tougher stuff than this."

He was right, you had! You'd spent six years protecting a princess from every danger under the sun. From assassins to snobby nobles, you'd seen more than one dangerous banquet. This was a piece of cake! You took a slow breathe, rolling your shoulders back and tilting your head up. You heard Grandmother make an affirmative noise, patting your elbow, and you took the final steps towards the banquet. Tenzo gave a playful whistle before he and Iki vanished; leaving you two alone as you took the step up into the banquet.

The room quieted, all heads turning to clan matron and clan heir. Even the music stopped, the musicians bowing their heads, and all but the heads of the clans followed suit. You couldn't help but blush at the sudden respect you were afforded, and bowed your head slightly. With that finished, you walked slowly towards the raised dais at the head of the hall. While Grandmother was the matron, tonight you would be given the head seat. The rest of the table was given empty place settings, five in total. One for each of the possible night suitors, if your grandmother made her decision early. 

You gazed over the hall, recognizing many of the faces of old friends. Every clan was here, both the head of the family and the heir; watching your every move. You sat down, moving the silk around you so it flowed around your legs as you knelt down. Grandmother remained standing, addressing the clans, "The Dotan clan presents their eldest child, (y/n) Dotan. Master of the Dotan arts. Guard of Princess Hana of the Land of Flowers. Greatly skilled in the ways of ninjustu, and the future head of the Dotan clan. By call of the Hokage, this banquet has been called forth, to attain a suitors for an alliance with the Dotan clan. Please accept our offer."

She bowed her head low, beseeching the participation of the clans. You already knew they would accept, it was all ceremony. Tradition was your grandmother's favourite thing, and you could see the edge of a smile at the corner of her veil. She was enjoying this, not that her words would betray that. You bowed your head as well, waiting for the verbal cue for the clans. One by one, the clans stood up, 

"The Hyuuga clan accepts."

"The Nara clan accepts."

"The Aburame clan accepts."

On and on the accepting went, until everyone had answered. With the first tradition complete, the clans sat down again. Through out the night, they would each step forward to introduce their chosen heir and, with Grandmother's approval, would display some talent or gift to the future bride. For now, the music and feasting could begin. The hired musician struck up a chord, and the hall turned back to its quiet din. A plate was gently placed in front of you, and you took part in the low chatter with your grandmother. 

A slow, building tension could be felt. One clan leader meeting the eyes of the other. Everyone waiting to see who would step forward first. Even you couldn't find peace with your meal, anxious to view your possible future husbands. You didn't have to wait long. Only fifteen minutes into the initial banquet, and the first suitor came forward. Breaking the tension, and now it would be a near line of people. It wasn't uncommon for a mild scuffle to occur if two clans tried to come forward at the same time (though you doubted Grandmother would let that get far).

You recognized Choji as he knelt down behind his father. This time you didn't move as they bowed, nor tilt your head. You were to remain as immovable as the mountain, but you still watched with interest as his father spoke, "The Akimichi clan humbly presents Akimichi Choji. A skilled fighter with the expansion justu, and a veteran of the fourth war. He would make your family strong! And, he's an excellent cook!"

Choji smiled, pulling forth a wrapped box and stepped towards the table; putting it in front of you. You nodded you head, delicately unwrapping the box to smell the most delicious food in your life. The beef cooked to perfection, and marinated in a thick sauce. Noodles just crispy enough to give it a crunch. You were grateful that tradition dictated you took a bite, and you had to suppress a hum as you slipped the bite past your lips. It was just as good as it smelled. The rich sauce mixed with the juicy beef, and the noodles had soaked in the umami; an explosion of flavour. You would've married the Akimichi clan right here and now if it promised you a life time of meals like this. Yet, you couldn't take a second bite, the gift taken to the side, and everyone waited in silence for Grandmother's answer. 

The silence set in as Grandmother silently observed the Akimichi men. You already knew from the silence she wouldn't accept, but she let the tension build. Finally, she looked away, signalling her rejection of their offer. It was that fast. If she had accepted, she would have extended her hand towards one of the chairs at the main table. Yet, they would remain empty for now. You noticed how Choji breathed a sigh of relief, and it finally hit you. Many of the men here, had been forced into this the same as you. You could imagine that a rejection was far more of a relief than it would have been decades ago. 

The two stepped away, and their spot was quickly filled by another clan; one you didn't recognize. One after the other. You almost started to doze off with their speeches and presentations, each one turned away. You weren't sure what she was waiting for, but you never had a chance to act. The clans kept coming forward, and you weren't even allowed to continue eating. Simply waiting, patient. 

"The Hyuuga clan humbly presents Hyuuga Neji. A master of the eight trigrams sixty four palms technique, a master of the Byakugan, a veteran of the fourth war, and a master of taijutsu. Our kekkei genkai would meld well with your family, bringing us both pride and honour." You tilted your eyes back down when you recognized that name. Seeing the two, bowed heads of brown hair. Neji had aged...rather handsomely you had to admit. Tall, and the lines of his jaw were rather handsome to admire. You were glad no one could see the faint blush on your cheeks. 

Neji tilted his gaze up, meeting yours and you could feel his kekkei genkai activate; knowing he could see the faint smile on your face and he matched it. Neji rose to his feet, standing in the centre of the hall for his performance. The musician struck a chord, and the performance began. A demonstration of the eight trigrams. Each strike of the music's chord was the strike of his palm. Performed with solemn perfection, you could feel the restraint as he worked to not harm the surroundings. It was beautiful. A moving work of art, and a perfect demonstration of power. 

You didn't know you were holding your breathe until you had to forcibly gasp. Only causing a smirk on Neji's face as he closed his performance. Cocky bastard knew he was good, and you couldn't blame him. You knew the legends of his talent, and to see it here was a confirmation of such ability. You gently touched Grandmother's arm as she weighed the importance of decision; a silent expression of your interest. It would be a good match, and you knew Neji from training school. You got along with him well enough, and he had a hidden, gentle talent. If anyone was to be a suitor, he was a good choice.

Finally, Grandmother moved, gesturing to the seat to your left. Accepting their offer, and confirming the first suitor of the night. The Hyuuga head bowed once more time and returned to his seat. Neji moved around the dais, and knelt by your side. "Your clan honours us with your acceptance."

You nodded, and when your grandmother was busying taking a drink, whispered quietly to him, "Its good to see you Neji. Are you well?"

"Well enough. Its been a while." he whispered back, hiding a smile at the breach in tradition. You weren't suppose to address any of them, or even really speak the entire night. This was an old friend, and you would address him as you please. He was the only one who could hear you after all, and you felt like you might go crazy if you couldn't speak. You elbowed him gently, disguising it as a reach for the sake, "Indeed. You performed beautifully, even Grandmother was entranced."

"I was more concerned with your enchantment. Near breathless from what I heard." you could hear the tease in his words, but he betrayed nothing on his face. You turned your eyes away, focusing on the new dish in front of you and took a bite. "The music was so beautiful, I was lost to it. Don't assume so much."

Neji barely stopped the laugh, you were a terrible liar in your daily life. You took several bites before the next family came forward, and you had to still once more. Examining the unknown clan, and the one after that. More rejections. You were only kept entertained by the gentle nudges Neji gave you; disguised as reaching for a drink or food. You returned them, keeping yourself silently focused on the task in front of you. Finally, another person you recognized came forward. Kiba's hair had groan, and you could see the flash of familiar fangs; daring for trouble.

"The Inuzuka clan humbly presents Inuzuka Kiba. He is a master of the Inuzuka ways, a veteran of the fourth war, able to hunt down even the most illusive enemy, and a friend to all canines. Together, the Dotan and Inuzuka clans would be a strong alliance."

Kiba stepped forward, unable to look at your veil. You looked in his arms, and there rested a small, black pup happily sleeping in his arms. "He is growing into a great guard dog, and will be able to protect your family."

You reached out, gently petting the puppy and it woke to nuzzle against your hand; licking at your fingers before it was taken aside by a servant. You ran your hand against Kiba's fingers before pulling away, tucking your hands back into their sleeves. Kiba had always been a sweetheart, if a bit cocky. You had spent long hours playing with the different Inuzuka puppies after a long day; helping keep them walked and entertained. Now they had given you one of your own.

Part of you doubted Grandmother would accept. She had only accepted Neji so far, one of the great five clans. The Inuzuka's might be rejected in place of the great four. Yet, with a huff, she gestured to the seat next to her. Your second suitor decided. You wanted to ask her her thinking, but now wasn't the time. You looked back to Kiba, seeing a frown on his face as he circled the table. Was he...disappointed to be chosen? You couldn't blame him, he wasn't the type who wanted to be tied down. He collapsed down heavily, "Your clan honours us with your acceptance." he huffed out, looking at his hands.

You didn't have time to sympathize with Kiba, as the next clan came in. The first pair of eyes you couldn't see as the Aburame clan knelt down, "The Aburame clan humbly presents Aburame Shino. He is a master of the Aburame insect technique, a veteran of the fourth war, and a great tactical leader with many successful missions under his name. Our clan would make a powerful force in the way we both use our chakra."

Shino stepped forward, and part of you worried he would give you a pet spider or beetle. You didn't hate insects, but you couldn't say you were fond of them as Shino was. He pulled his hands out of his pockets, and with the flourish, a flight of purple butterflies followed. Fluttering through the room, some clinging to the lanterns and paintings; a few delicately resting in your hair. They were the exact shade of purple as your clan's colours. You held up a finger, one landing on your hand. Shino spoke.

"We bred the butterflies for this specific colour. They will warn of anyone breaking the perimetre of your home and..." Shino paused, "They compliment your beauty quite well."

You couldn't help but blush at his words, even as Neji clicked his tongue in disgust. Shino had never been so forward before. The two of you rarely talked, and when you did was curt and to the point. He never seemed to have time for flowery words. How tradition and duty changed people. With the Aburame clan being one of the five, it was no surprise when she pointed to the spot next to Kiba. Shino nodded, taking the spot and repeating the same words as all the other.

"Alright! Now its my turn! I'm Naruto Uzumaki, and I'm here cause Grandma Tsunade said I had to be! But I'm not marrying some random person, no matter how cool she is!" 

You snapped your gaze back as Naurto jumped into the middle of the room. Honestly, part of you was surprised about all the rumours you had heard. Defeating the Akatsuki, helping end the fourth war, and being the controller of the nine-tailed fox. It may have been a strong alliance, but he broke all tradition, and that infuriated Grandmother more than anything. She slammed her hands on the table, "How dare you violate the tradition of this banquet! Remove yourself at once, you are not worth of my family or my grandchild!"

Several of the clans roared in agreement, and Naruto was happy to leave. Quickly escorted out by several of the clan man, trying to impress your grandmother with their strength and dedication to tradition. You doubted it would work though, their was only one or two spots left; depending on her mood. The room was quiet, the rhythm of the evening disrupted, and no one was quite sure how to continue. Luckily, the Nara clan stepped forward next.

"The Nara clan humbly presents Nara Shikamaru. He is a master of the shadow possession justu, highly intelligent with an IQ over two hundred and ten, a verteran of the fourth war, and a brilliant strategist. This alliance would bring great honour to both our families, and success in future combat."

Shikamaru looked almost bored as he walked forward. You knew of all people, he wanted to be here the least. You could imagine the 'what a drag' that must be echoing in his mind as he signaled the musician. Of all things, you never expected Shikamaru to present a dance. The shadows of the room growing darker as he pulled them with the movements. Swaying, weaving, and dancing around them. A graceful peace of dexterity and beauty, all kept in a soft, focused tilt to his lips. You could tell he was enjoying it, in his own way. The patient, perfected movements that must have taken weeks to master. The shadows swaying and weaving with him, daring to run through your hair and against your hands. It was beautiful in a hidden, forbidden way. Like you were watching a secret you should not have been told.

It was of little surprise after such a skilled performance (the necessary chakra and experience to control the shadows like that was immense), that Grandmother pointed towards the seat next to Neji. Shikamaru froze, his eyes widened and he didn't move for a moment. He probably hadn't expected for the acceptance, probably dreaded it. Now, he was stuck in this like you were. His father shoved him forward, and Shikamaru stumbled over to the spot, "Your...your clan honours us with your acceptance."

That was four, and most likely final. It was rare for five suitors to be accepted. The last of clans came forward, and all were rejected. You sighed in relief that the ceremony was over, and you could enjoy the meal put before you. You gently nudge Neji, giving a smile you knew he could see through the veil and he matched it. A saving grace from the tense ceremony. 

"The Uchiha clan humbly submits myself, Uchiha Itachi. I serve as the head of my clan, was a member of the ANBU since a young age. While I may be blind now, I am still a master of the Sharingan. While much doubt surrounded my work, as I worked with the Akatsuki and slaughtered my clan, I have done so all in dedication to my village and its people. We both have suffered great loss, and together we could rebuild out clans; stronger than before."

You were stunned. Never did you expect Itachi to come to the banquet. You hadn't even noticed he was there, and now he was putting himself forward as a potential suitor. Even if it had been for the village, he was still a murderer. He had done, atrocities things. There was no way Grandmother could accept! Itachi stepped forward, extending his hands towards you. "Please, allow me to show you my strength. Even as weakened as I am, no one compares to my ability."

You looked at your Grandmother, unsure if you could reach out and touch him or not; many clans mumbling their anger. Was it a trap? You had known Itachi as a child, he was always so patient. Then he...all those deaths. There was no way. Grandmother nodded, and you had no choice but to extend your hands and experience his gift. The moment your fingers touched, you could feel his chakra flow into your body and then out again. It felt like a river was running through you, bright and fresh. The power of a hundred jounin, it was overwhelming. Literal sparks echoing between your hands as you pulled away.

Everyone waited, leaning forward in their seats. Watching Grandmother as she debated the choice. Loud yelling filled the room as she pointed to the final seat, and Grandmother slammed her hands on the table. Silently demanding they quiet their disapproval. Itachi bowed, walking around the table and taking his place. A fifth, and final suitor. "Your clan honours me with your acceptance." 

You grasped Neji's hand under the table, squeezing it tight; partially in shock, partially in fear. He squeezed it once, before making you let go. No sense getting in trouble now. 

With the final suitor decided, Grandmother rose to her feet. "The suitors have been decided. All of you have honoured us with your sons and we thank you humbly. The bride and their suitors shall depart to their new home for a private dinner. You are all welcome to eat, drink, and celebrate with me."

She bowed her head, and the rest of the room returned it. With that spoken, you rose to your feet, as did Neji, Kiba, Shino, Shikamaru, and Itachi followed suit. All bowed their heads as you left, doing your best not to betray your own, nervous tics as you left the room. Tucking your hands and sleeves as you took the elevated walkway towards the freshly prepared home. 

Tenzo appeared from near thin air the moment you stepped outside, walking behind you as you made your way. You dreaded this part the most. You were expected to be polite and entertain. You were a ninja for gods sake! This was completely against who you were, you weren't a house wife! But, tradition demanded it. At the very least, you could be polite. Some of the men seemed as miserable as you, and friendly company would be welcome. No one would be watching you anymore for perfection.

Tenzo raced forward to the door of your new home for the next three months, sliding it open and bowing his head. You stepped inside, already smelling the cooked food and sake. You walked towards the dining room, still speaking nothing as the men looked over the traditional decorations and floor mats. Grandmother must have been the decorator for this place too. 

Neji was the first to reach out to you, helping you up the short steps into the dining room and guiding you towards your seat. You gave him a grateful smile, and waited for the rest to sit down in their place. Neji and Shikamaru at the tables on the left, Kiba and Shino on the right, and Itachi at the far table opposite you to complete the dining square. With everyone in place, you bowed your head. Time to finish the last ceremony.

"I thank you, for bringing our families together. I shall do my best to choose a husband from among you, and bring both clans great honour. Now, let us no longer be strangers." You sat up straight, and with careful fingers, pulled the veil pins free. The silk fluttered down into your lap, and you looked up to meet the gaze of each suitor. All of their mouths had dropped open slightly, struck by your appearance. You must look quite different after six years, and you quickly covered you mouth as you laughed. 

"Geez you guys, its just me. Now lets eat, we can actually relax now."


	3. A Home that Wasn't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (y/n) and their five suitors try to relax and enjoy supper, despite the circumstances, before all moving into the new home you'll be sharing over the next three months

You couldn't help but laugh at the surprised expression all five of the men wore. Each of them frozen in spot, their eyes darting around the room as though they were waiting for Grandmother to burst through the door and scold them on their lack of etiquette. All of you were a bit tense, the pressure of the evening was all precariously balanced on the perfection of tradition and manners. Now, the person they were suppose to impress, was telling them to relax. It was easy to see why they were suspicious.

"I know my grandmother can be a bit harsh, but we can relax now. We're suppose to get to know each other, now and over the coming months." you took a deep breathe, "I know some of you don't want to be here. To be honest, I don't want to be here either. I'd have preferred Tsunade left me in the land of flowers to continue my mission as a body guard. Yet, here I am, stuck in a partial engagement to people I knew in training school. The best we can do right now, is make the most of it. For example, the food is amazing, so we might as well enjoy it. Else Choji might break into the room and scold us for ignoring it."

You saw Kiba and Shikamaru's shoulders drop in relief. While the other three remain just as poised as before, you were going to assume that they were generally poised people; you could only hope your words had given them some peace. You took the lid off your dish, hoping to avoid the awkward silence of the room by eating instead. Despite the two hours of ceremony, you had barely managed to get more than five bites in. Every time you had tried to eat something, a new clan interrupted with an offer of their son. Now, finally, you could eat something in peace.

You don't know who cooked (it was definitely not Grandmother, she could burn water before she could boil it), but you would have to find out. It was nearly as good as what Choji had made, nearly. Good enough that the others began to eat too, the small dining room filling with the sound of chopsticks hitting bowls, the occasional loud bite, and the distinct sigh of a meal enjoyed. You'd hoped one of them would speak up, break the tension, and make the coming months a bit easier. As though he could hear your silent prayer, Itachi put down his chopsticks on any empty plate, "Thank you for the meal (y/n). Were you the cook?"

It was a conversation! You didn't trust the speaker, but you would take the conversation nonetheless. Maybe it was the start to understanding how he could kill his own family. One thing was for sure, you had no intent of marrying this one! You smiled, shaking your head, "No, if I was the cook we'd all be eating reheated rations and whatever I could scrounge up out of the flower bed."

"Probably poison us all just to get out of wearing that headdress." Shikamaru snickered, and you shot him a glare, "Maybe. Could you blame me? It weighs like twenty pounds and my scalp itches but I can't reach it. I swear, try to remove one pin and my grandmother could materialize through the wall to get me."

"Oh, as though the great (y/n) couldn't get away with a few hair pins, sounds troublesome." Again, the spiky haired man snickered, leaning on the table to better fix you with a smart smirk. Of all the people, Shikamaru seemed to have changed the most. He was still the same, lazy person you had grown up knowing, but now there was a certain aged knowledge to his words. To all of them really, they had seen far too much in a life so short. 

"Come on Shikamaru, leave her alone, she doesn't want to be here anymore than the rest of us." Kiba groaned, flicking a grain of rice at the other man. He huffed, resting his elbows on the table, meal untouched, "I mean really. Can't you just end this right now (y/n)? You and Neji get along well enough, just pick him so we can go home."

"Enough Kiba, have some respect. The hokage ordered this, its not their decision." Neji spat back, slamming his utensils down on the table. "Maybe the coming months will teach you some basic manners."

"Oh that's a load of fucking crap! We all know you're here cause you were ordered too. Don't try and act like you're enjoying this anymore than the rest of us." 

You slowly started to lean back as Neji and Kiba began to trade insults back and forth, the other three unsure of how to but in; Shikamaru almost broke the chopsticks he was holding, while Shino and Itachi continued as though nothing was happening. You knew that this was, in a way, your fault. Even if the arrangement wasn't your idea, it was your presence that had caused it. At least, you had always known this would happen, the others had no such preparation. The guilt built up as the two continued yelling, and Shikamaru kept giving quick snips that only inflamed the situation. 

"Quiet. Some is coming." Shino interrupted, and the room stilled. Shino took one look around the room, shaking his head, "Try not to forget, you are not the only ones brought into this situation. Its not about you."

Kiba sunk back into his seat, giving a heavy sigh. Neji walked over to the door, sliding it open to greet a young woman holding a koto. She bowed her head, speaking in a knowing tone, "The matron said some music would accompany the evening quite well."

You should have known Grandmother couldn't leave you alone. Lest one of you make a mistake and embarrassed themselves. Or perhaps she heard the yelling and found this the best way to calm it. Either the way, with one simple instrument, the tension of tradition tightened around all your necks once again. You straightened yourself back up, smoothing the lines of the kimono as the woman took position in the corner of the room. Soon, the sharp plucks of the koto filled the silence. Clearing your throat, you addressed the group, "With music, then there is a need to dance. Some of you have displayed your own, graceful aptitude for the art. Now allow me to show you mine."

It had been Grandmother's idea of course, to dance for whomever she chose as suitors. To display your more 'delicate' talents. Of course, you'd complained about an outdated idea and how you hadn't danced in years but she would have none of it. You were hoping you could get away with not dancing at all, but now with her little koto spy here, it was a tad too late. 

You rose from the table, taking small steps around the table til you stood in the centre of the room; hands tucked into either sleeve. You knew this piece well, as did many in the village. Of the falling of the autumn leaves, a sign for all the ninja to return home to their families. To their partners. So the dance began, slow, weaving movements with your arms that was balanced out with the small steps and turns of your feet. Speaking the story of a war ended with movement alone. The falling of the leaves found in the controlled twirl of your wrist. The feeling of home in the sharp turn of your heel. 

You imagined the scene in your mind as you danced. The red leaves, cascading around the homesick ninja. A threat of winter, the need to return home til spring again. That, joyful, and impossibly long journey home. Every morning, hoping to see the village from the next hill. Dashing down the street, searching, searching, and there! There they are. Standing in front of a home you had not seen in so long, waving, arms outstretched. And you are home. 

The dance ended on a soft, sad note, and with you frozen; one arm reaching to the invisible family in your mind and the other curled against your chest, and the duty you hold in it. There is no applause for a moment, and you gaze around the room to see a level of understanding that your, old friends should never have. It hit you slowly, that they knew this feeling. War had changed them, it had changed you all. Itachi was the first to clap, a quiet sound, scared to break the silence but the others joined in. Slow and quiet, processing the memory, and you straightened; giving a shallow bow. You hadn't realized you were crying til you saw the tear hit the tatami under you. How long you had been gone. How much you had missed home. Family. It would never be the same, it couldn't. For you were no longer the same person who had left, all those years ago.

"I...I hope the performance was, an adequate display. Please, excuse me, I must retire. I have yet to rest since I returned...I will see you all..." You swallowed hard around the words, "At our home."

You turned quickly, leaving the way you had come in. No one moved to stop you, lost in a memory of war and violence. It still didn't feel like peace, no matter how much they tried. You began to walk down the walkway, trying to move quickly before anyone spotted you, and in a moment of frustration, you kicked off the sandals into the pond below. Hiking the kimono up, you broke into a flat sprint; fighting back a sob in your throat. Why. Why was this the home you had returned to? Was it even home anymore? Or just a pen to keep you in? Surrounded by memories that are no longer there, and promises that the walls couldn't keep. 

Tenzo called after you as you ran, but you ignored it. Running to your new home, once your great aunt's home, before she had been beheaded upon the door step. Her children and grandchildren piled inside, blood seeping all the way down into the rafters. If only they had burned this, and every home here down. No, your home was to be the standing monument of the death that still lingered in its frame. You grabbed the sliding door frame, pulling it open just as Tenzo grabbed your wrist. You tried to jerk it back, but his grip held firm. Masked eyes boring into you as his calm, leveled voice rang through, "Hey, are you alright?"

"No." There was no point in lying, any ANBU could see through a lie in a heartbeat. "And I do not wish to talk about it with a man I don't even know the face of. Let alone even his real name. Please release me so I can enjoy my misery in peace."

You already felt bad for being so harsh. The words crueler than you felt, but you wanted to push everything away in the moment. To be left to the grief of your home, and of your life. To mourn. Tenzo released your wrist, and grabbed something from his pouch. "I get it, and that's fine. Remember, you can't be miserable forever. Here. You dropped them."

He held out the now soaking wet sandals, before putting them down on the hard wood of the patio. The moment the hard soles touched the wood, he was then gone. Moving so fast, your tear-blurred eyes couldn't even trace the movement. Leaving you alone to your grief and pity, even if he was watching from a distance. You looked back to the open doorway, not a single lamp or candle was lit, and the building seemed to yawn with its unending darkness. You could imagine the lifeless, white eyes of your aunts, cousins, and uncles. But, they weren't there. Not anymore. They were buried under a peace tree like the rest of your family. To forever grow with the fruit your clan loved so much. Instead, the entrance held little to nothing. A few, old calligraphy paintings hung on the wall in your great aunt's hand, a new bonsai tree sitting on a low table. Very little was here at all. As you explored the house, you found the same, traditional style as Grandmother's home. The place made all the more unfamiliar by it. This wasn't your home, nor your great aunt's home. Your home was a small apartment in the land of flowers. With as many small plants as you could fit, a pillow filled bed, and a view of the cherry blossom court. Now, that apartment was empty, Princess Hana was due to be married, and you were here. 

Your room was put on the second floor, as were all the bedrooms, with yours facing the rising sun. Walking in, you felt a gentle wave of relief to find all your plants here. The small peach bonsai, the bamboo plant you had named 'mr. stalk', and even the collection of cacti (a gift from the village hidden in the sand). Your pillows had been placed on the low bed, giving it the feel of home, and the rest of your belongings were still in two boxes; it was all you had to your name, but it had been enough. 

To see your things. These, small things that had made up your home for so long, brought you some form of peace. Your eyes drying, and the gentle shake of your hands vanished as you stroked a lavender blossom. It wasn't home, not yet, but it could be. You had survived, the loss of family, the loss of home, and the loss of friends. You had seen war and murder and every violence under the sun. You were an unstoppable force of nature, and you would make this place your home. Find, some happiness in it. Even if it was only in the way the moonlight spilled into the room; bathing it in a silver glow, like heavy ripples of water. 

You would survive. As you always have.

Now alone, you began the process of removing every pin and layer Grandmother had put on you. Piling the finery and tradition at your door, and letting you hair fall loose around you; curving to your features. You stopped only when in the last, shift layer of your kimono, letting the light purple silk slip down your shoulders to feel the cool, moonlight air on your skin. You stepped onto the short balcony, looking out onto the Nara forest and then up to the moon. How lonely she must be, all the way up there. Or maybe she wasn't, maybe the stars gave her company whenever she craved it. Even she had more choice in lovers than you.

"It does you no good to be envious of the moon." A voice whispered, and you jumped; reaching for a kunai you didn't have. Damn Grandmother and her weaponless traditions! You peered over the rail, ready to fight any intruders, only to see Neji on the ground; looking up at you with a faint smile. You tilted your hand, leaning over the rail more, "I'm not being envious of her. I'm admiring her."

Neji grabbed the side of the building, easily scaling it til he was sitting on the rail next to you. He had also let his hair down, the light brown locks fluttering in the soft breeze and clinging to his cheek. "Really? So you weren't imagining how nice it must be to be away from all this and live among stars?"

"Damn." you mumbled, fighting back a smile. Neji chuckled, looking up, "I know you (y/n). It has been a long time, but I still know you."

He was always the closest. Neji understood the weight of mastering a kekkei genkai, of familial expectations, of following tradition. You both wanted to be more than those expectations, and you helped strive for that goal together. He was a perfect friend, and you were glad he was here, even if it was to strive for a marriage. 

"It would be nice wouldn't it? To be the moon. To be free of all this..." you gestured to everything around you, giving a soft huff. Neji nodded, "Perhaps, but I think I would miss a few things."

"Oh? Like what?" you teased, raising a brow as you awaited his answer. There was no way he was being this, genuinely corny. Neji? The sappy sentimental? No way. Neji opened his mouth to answer, a smirk in the corner of his lips, but you heard a faint knock on your bedroom door. You shot Neji a look, waving him back, "You need to go. Lest we get in any trouble."

"Trouble? We're not do-"

"Go." you laughed, pushing him down as he began to climb back down the building. You turned around on the rail to face the door, playing with a strand of hair, "Come in."

It was no stretch to say you were surprised to see Kiba walk through the door. Like a misbehaving puppy, he kept his gaze to the floor as he stepped in. Careful to avoid knocking anything over. "I wanted to apologize. I was being an ass earlier."

"Its alright." you mumbled, scratching your cheek as he finally got close enough. Kiba shook his head, "I mean, it just sucks that we were all pulled into this. Nobody asked us what we wanted, not even you. Look at all these plants, I bet you were pretty happy in the land of flowers, and now you're back here having to marry someone you haven't seen in six years. It sucks."

You didn't really know what to say. Kiba had really nailed it on the head, straight to the point. Maybe he was hanging around with Naruto too much. You opened your mouth to speak, trying to find words to agree with him, but Kiba continued, "Anyway. I'm sorry for being an idiot. I'm sure we can make the best of this. At least, we get to live in a nice house together! And do fun stuff that the hokage has to pay for cause its a 'mission'. It'll be....I should get going huh? You looked pretty tired when you left."

"Its been...a rather long day for me. Not even a night's rest between coming home and this dinner. Sleep would be nice." Kiba nodded, giving a weak smile as he began to walk away. He only paused as you called out to him, "Kiba?...Thank you."

"Yea, no problem." he grinned, heading out of the room. You smiled as he left, before heading off the balcony, closing the paper door behind you. Moving some pillows around, you collapsed onto your bed, staring up at the ceiling. How had you managed to fit all of this into one day? How long was tomorrow going to feel like? You were already exhausted thinking about it. Just as you closed your eyes, there was another knock on the door. With a groan, you propped yourself up on one elbow. "Yea? What is it?"

"Its Shino. I brought you something." 

Shino? Now that was unexpected. Course, Shino participating in this at all was surprising. He didn't seem the type to marry at all, and yet here he was, and surprisingly charming at that. You made a noise of approval, and the door slide open. There was Shino...without a jacket. It was almost like seeing him naked. Not once, in the whole time you knew him, had you seen Shino in anything less than tent-like. You felt your cheeks redden, even seeing him now, fully clothed in the form fitting mesh of the ninja, felt dirty; not helped by the robe that was still slipped off your shoulders as you lounged in bed. You tried to look anywhere else, and focused on what he was carrying. 

"Sliced peaches?" you questioned as the ninja stepped closer, taking a seat next to your bed. Shino nodded, putting the plate down and picking up a piece. "You didn't really eat that much at dinner. I thought you might be hungry."

Of course he had noticed that. Being so quiet all the time, he must notice a good deal of things that he never mentioned. You nodded, shifting so you could reach for a slice when Shino extended the piece he was holding to your lips. Was he...really? You couldn't help but be immediately suspicious. Shino. Who hadn't shown a single, romantic bone in his body, was now trying to feed you peaches. "Shino..."

"Just take the peach. I have to show I'm making some effort in this." he mumbled, his lips pulling into a frown. Ah, you though so. He was as uncomfortable as the rest of you. You wonder how much he'd talked to Sakura and Ino about romance, the peach thing definitely seemed like something they would cook up. You nodded, and let him feed you the first piece; the fruit still juicy and fresh and a few drops of juice dripped down your chin.

"You know, you don't have to make an effort in this. Just be you, and the three months will be over in no time." you mumbled around the fruit before swallowing. Shino shook his head, grasping your chin between thumb and forefinger and you gasped; feeling the strong, calloused hand as he wiped the juice from your chin. "Its your duty to find a husband. And its my duty to try and be that husband. That is what the Aburames ask of me."

You understood that feeling. Doing your best to be pleasant. Letting an old friend feed you peaches. Dancing for entertainment. Hosting dinner parties. All in the line of duty. Shino was doing his part to try and win you over, even if he would rather not be here at all. "I know Shino. We are doing what we must."

He nodded, letting go of your chin, and he stood up. "Thank you, (y/n). If it was anyone else, this task might have been unbearable."

"Sleep well Shino." you mumbled, taking a slice for yourself as he left, "You too."

He bumped right into Shikamaru as he stepped out; Shikamaru just about to knock on your door. He looked confused, giving Shino a tilt of his head, but when the bug ninja didn't answer he stepped in. He extended a hand, only the purple, silk veil you had left in the dining room. "Here. Thought your grandma might have your head if she found you'd left this."

"Probably." you laughed, tossing the veil into the pile with everything else. Shikamaru leaned against the wall, sliding his hands into the pockets of the formal kimono his father must've forced him into. He pulled a cigarette out of his pocket, about to light it before he thought better of the room he was in. He sighed, "I'm not good with this stuff, but its good to have you back. Honestly, I didn't think I'd miss you as much as I did. Suppose every village needs one of you."

"One of me? And what exactly am I Shikamaru?" you raised a brow, curious and yet somehow dreading whatever he was going to say next. Shikamaru tensed, as though knowing he'd stepped into landmine territory. "Ah jeez. You know, extremely sentimental, plant loving, throws-themself-into-danger-regardless-of-risk type."

"Are you calling me a martyr?" you tried to sound offended, not really seeing anything wrong with it but definetly trying to screw with the lazy man. Shikamaru groaned, and you gave a laugh. He caught on when he saw your smile, and shook his head, "You are all trouble."

"Maybe, but that's part of why you missed me."

"It is. No one else can get into so much trouble and then charm their way out of it." he laughed, pushing off the wall to squat next to the bed. He reach out, ruffling your hair for a moment, "I mean, who else am I going to go cloud watching with? You're the only one who can lie still long enough. Now, I'm off to sleep. That'll take some getting use to in a new place."

You smiled as he stepped away, feeling a bit more at ease then before. Shikamaru always had that way about him. Slowing the rest of the world down as he spoke. Cloud watching with him took away every worry. That was definitely something you would have to do with him soon. You grabbed the final peach slice, popping it in your mouth before curling up in bed to actually sleep. Part of you waited for any of the other men to return and interrupt your sleep routine, but when none did, you let yourself drift to sleep.

Oh how you wished it was peaceful. 

The night was filled with the scent of blood. You could see it, seeping through the tatami mats, dripping from the wooden beams. Your family, clinging to the walls. Crawling from the ceiling and over your body, trying to drag you into the house with them. Demanding that you stay home, and never leave again. To be with them, forver. You tossed and turned violently as you slept, and just as you great aunt tried to drag you into the floor, you awoke. Shooting upright from the dream, clutching the kimono close to your chest. You could feel the sweat on your back and brow chill in the night air, a scream just stuck in your throat. You looked over to the balcony, the doors swinging open...you swore you had closed those. 

You flopped back down, not daring to close your eyes again. Your eyelids felt tattooed with the dream and its words. The last thing you wanted was sleep. You were just about ready to resign yourself to a sleepless night, when you felt something from your door. A pulse. No...not a heart pulse. A pulse of chakra. A strong thrum that rang against your skin. You instantly recognized it as Itachi's. You would recognize it anywhere from now on, permanently imprinted in your mind, much like his face was. 

It pulsed again. A rhythm? No...a code. Short and long pulses. Morse code! He was sending you a message.

"Are you alright?" the code read out, and you whispered your response; knowing he could hear, even through the door. "Just a nightmare."

"I felt you wake up, scared. I was worried, but I didn't want to intrude."

"I'm alright now. Nightmares are like that." you muttered, sitting up and looknig to the door. You could see the faint trace of his frame against the door, he must have a candle with him. The pulses came again, "You should try to sleep again."

"I don't think I can." you paused, waiting for his words. You could almost hear his voice within the pulses, "I can stay here, until you fall asleep. No nightmares while I'm here."

"That's a big promise to keep."

"I think I'm up to the task." you heard a faint laugh come from the other side of the door, and you smothered your own. It was, odd of him to be here. You were sure most if not all of the men had heard you wake, but here he was first. Offering to keep you safe. You let out a breathe, falling back against the pillows, "Then stay Itachi. Until I fall asleep."

His reply was only found as he blew out the candle. You could feel his presence, guarding, watching, sensing for anything that might disturb you. A security you knew he could provide, and it let your tired body drift to sleep once more. 

This time, you dreamt of peach trees and hyacinths, and those things, alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCxXo3LFDa4 This is what I was listening to as I wrote, it might be nice to listen to it while you read!


	4. On Your Own, Alone

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Its (y/n) first day living with suitors, will they flourish or fluster? Or will the coming events change everything?

"Up, up! You won't find your husband laying in bed all day. Don't know how you find anything in this mess."

You awoke to the sound of Grandmother rummaging through your room. Her arms just long enough to reach through your belongings to look for something suitable to wear. Rubbing the sleep from your eyes, you watch her throw your vest to the floor and huff. "Look at this! Nothing but ninja gear and trousers! How are you going to find a husband if you can't even dress nicely! Luckily, I thought ahead before I came over."

"Grandmother...Its six in the morning, no one is going to be up yet." you whined as she pulled you from your bed and pushed a pile of teal silk into your arms, "Oh nonsense. That lovely Hyuuga boy was outside practicing. Get changed, I had some groceries brought down so you can all have a nice breakfast. Make sure to smile."

It was easier to just change than argue, you could always slip into something more comfortable when she left. The black shift was covered with a teal hakama skirt, and you smiled as you ran a finger over the embroidery; you knew your mother's needlework instantly. At the very least, you would be able to train in this later. They may have stopped you from going on missions, but that was no reason to stop pushing your abilities. As you stepped back into view, Grandmother made an approving hum, "There, you look so handsome! Now go down there and play nice!"

"I'm going, I'm going." You yawned, taking your time down the stairs. As you thought, most of them were still sleeping; Kiba snored so loud you heard him from down the hall. On days like this, you doubted they were going to get up early. You wished your grandmother had the same thoughts for you. The burn of the morning sun was more than you ever wished to deal with. The moment you reached the kitchen, you pulled the curtains closed over the window; darkening the room and giving your eyes some peace from the early morn glare.

You settled the tea kettle onto the stove before beginning to pull groceries out of the fridge. In the back of your mind, you silently thanked your great aunt for being forward thinking enough to install modern devices into the space. You didn't know how Grandmother managed to get by without even a fridge. Making a mental list of the ingredients you had, you settled on making omelets for the morning. You had your own plans to go out and train, and the protein would be good for all of you. Plus, it fulfilled Grandmother's wish of you cooking for the rest of the house. That would be a one time event, after this they were on their own; you weren't going to be serving on them hand and foot, they were grown men!

Cooking was an art form of itself really. The patient wait, listening for the right simmering sound and the colour of the egg. A certain dexterity to flip it perfectly in the pan. Training as a shinobi tended to affect the rest of your life as well, even if it was just making the perfect omelet. The gentle aroma filling the house as you set one plate after the other at the floor level table. Without needing to be called, they each filtered down into the room; each in various states of dress. Shikamaru sporting a very spiky afro of hair; yawning as he sat down. Neji came in, wiping any sweat from his brow before taking a seat. Before joining them, you took the last plate and stepped outside for a moment. Setting the warmed ceramic on the porch, you looked around for Tenzo. Of course you couldn't spot him, that was part of his job after all. Yet, as you looked over your shoulder one last time before heading in, you saw the plate and omelet already gone; a small smile working onto your face as you rejoined the men.

"Thank you for making breakfast (y/n)." Itachi said as you sat down, and the others repeated something similar in tired, muffled voices. Itachi, Neji, and Shino seemed the most awake. Kiba kept nodding off inbetween bites of food, and you were pretty sure Shikamaru had managed to fall asleep with his eyes open; creepily staring at the far wall, unblinking. You couldn't blame them, it was still too early to even be alive, but the day had to be done.

"I'm going for a walk." You interrupted the tired silence of breakfast, taking a sip from your coffee cup as the group looked to you. Neji began to open his mouth, probably to offer company, but you quickly interrupted. "Alone. This is a small house, I need to have some time to myself. I'll return by supper, but don't wait for me. I'm sure all of you have missions to be assigned."

"You should be careful. There was that guy in our woods yesterday." Shikamaru chimed in, apparently not asleep at all. Of course he knew, the whole forest belonged to the Nara family, made sense they would be notified. You nodded, standing up to put your plate in the sink; cleaning it with a few gentle scrubs. "I know, but I've lived with the possibility of danger for years. Its no reason to not do anything. Besides, no matter what I do, I can guarantee the ANBU will continue to follow me. I'll be perfectly safe."

"Allow one of my beetles to accompany you. Just in case." Shino muttered over your shoulder, grabbing your plate as it slipped from your fingers. He was still so quiet when he moved, you hadn't even noticed his presence. The young man held up a finger and a beetle crawled off his nail and onto your shoulder. Smiling, you gently patted the beetle's head with your finger. "Alright."

You headed for the door, grabbing your sandals and slipping them on to head to the woods. "You all be good. I don't want to see the house burned down when I get back!"

The Nara woods were always impressive. The canopy was so high up, and only faint glimmers of sunlight could break through. Everywhere you went, you felt the eyes of the forest on you. The eyes of Tenzo as well. Eyes of the beetle. It was like someone had let a porcelain doll loose from its case, and now everyone was making sure it didn't break. Their presence made you more paranoid than the thought of the stranger from before. You had to lose them, find some space for yourself. Just, a few minutes to breathe. 

Thank goodness you were a ninja as well. First, you gently took the beetle off your shoulder, placing it on a berry bush. One pair of eyes, gone. Now, it was time to lose Tenzo. You closed your eyes, taking a moment to recognize the pulse of chakra near you. He was...in a tree, somewhere to your rear left. You stood up, adjusting the pleats of you skirt, casual as you like, and continued your walk again. Moving deeper into the forest. You couldn't let Tenzo know you were onto him, or that you planned to make a run for it. No, first, you had to lull him into a false sense of security.

There was one place in the forest that you would always train in as a child, and that's where you went; only an hours walk. You feet knowing the way by memory, and you barely had to pay attention to your walking. Instead, you paid attention to your follower. At first, he followed behind at a tight five metre distance, but the longer you walked, the longer his distance became. Slowly growing confident that all was well, and he didn't have to keep a close eye on you. By the time you reached your old spot, he was hovering fifteen metres off. Not enough, but it was getting there. At least, you could get some training done, and then, when you felt his chakra settle, you would move into his blind spot and run.

This old place still bore the marks of your childhood training. One tree sported your name carved into the bark. Another full of old stab marks and regrown bark over the places you had punched or kicked it bare. A rotten and old ladder led up into one of the trees, and you knew that if you were to make your way up there, you would find the old fort. Full of decomposing scrolls, and a tin box full of hand made, paper shuriken. You use to bring the others here, and play Seige. You hiding up in the fort, fighting against the other kids as they tried to climb the tree and take your fort. Closing your eyes, you thought you could hear the faint laughter of the past move on the wind. 

With that, old thought in mind, you smiled and tied the sleeves of your gown back. Freeing your arms to practice. The long, patient movements. Slow and steady. Mother had taught you to be slow when you practiced. Speed came from perfection, not haste. Even Grandmother still practices the Dotan martial art form. Slow, sweeping movements. Like the run of a river, or the movement of the trees. Flowing from one step to the next. It was like dancing again, but you knew the power behind each, slow strike. Time and time again, you had laid an opponent on his back with these techniques. One motion flowing into the next, never knowing where the river will go, but always arriving at its destination.

It was hard to say how long you practiced. The hours slipped through with the movements, your sandals gently gliding on the ground now; your movements wearing a bear patch in the ground that made it easier. The wind moved with you, tousling your hair as you turned left, and changing course when you went right. A steady flow of chakra moving through your body and into the air and back into you. Connecting you to this place, letting it flow with you. Letting you flow into it. You could feel the steady pulse of Tenzo in the trees above, and the watching eyes of the deer and foxes, and something else. Something further away and wrong. Buried beneath the earth, you couldn't tell if it was alive or dead. Yet, when you tried to focus on it, the feeling vanished altogether. You let it go, it was too far away anyway. You only felt what was around you, part of you connected with it. So slow and patient, not even the ANBU noticed. It was a technique that took time, lots of time, but when you could, you could sense every breathe of chakra. 

And Tenzo's chakra? It had slowed to a lazy pulse. Barely watching, and you knew that the man had fallen asleep in the tree. Lulled by the gentle push and pull of your movement without noticing at all. Perfect. 

You let your steps flow further away from Tenzo, making sure he didn't follow you. When he didn't even so much as move, you flowed into the blind spot. Stepping in front of a tree, as though it were nothing at all. Still, nothing. Your feet came to a sudden pause, mid step, and you pushed off. Darting into the trees, climbing one and taking from branch to branch; vanishing deeper into the forest before the ANBU had time to even wake up. 

You moved fast and quietly, keeping your chakra quiet and hidden. Not wanting a sound of it to escape in case Tenzo had woken up already. Going deeper and deeper into the forest until you no longer recognized your surroundings. You took a moment, trying to hear or sense anything that might suggest you were followed, and found nothing. No eyes upon you. No chakra bearing over you. No princess nagging you.

For the first time, in six years, you were given some peace and quiet.

Climbing back down to the forest floor, you looked around again. The forest felt impossibly large. Impossibly empty. Flowers were just in bloom, and ivy vines climbed the lengths of the taller trees. An imported species perhaps? It was rare to see such beauty in the forest, but perhaps that is why you had stopped here. You took the time to look at each plant, running you hands over the ivy tresses to test their strength, and listening to the way the wind rustled the leaves here. Everything was as it should be, and you felt free. 

You hummed softly to the trees, until you finally found the perfect spot to rest. This tree's roots spread open, creating a perfect corner for you to sit in. All that training and running, a nap was the first thing on your list. The afternoon sun lined up right on this spot, warming it perfectly as you curled up in it, and the occasional breeze made sure it didn't get to warm. It was perfect, and with that early wake up call, it was no wonder you drifted off to sleep. 

"Wakey wakey sunshine!" A gruff voice muttered in your ear, and you startled awake at the sound and the unfamiliar burn of chakra. The ground was swaying underneath you, and as you tried to move, you realized you were being carried over someone's shoulder; your hands tied behind your back. What was...You looked at the person carrying you. It was a tall man, his face covered by a large straw hat, and a katana swung by his hip. You saw the corner of a grin on his face as he spoke again, "Ah there we go. Can't have you asleep when the boss sees you. He said he wanted to kill off the last Dotan, personally."

You tried to ask a question; what did he mean the last? You still had Grandmother after all! When you tried, you finally recognized the gag in your mouth; silencing any cries for help. What was happening? Was this...did he work for the people that had killed you family? Was this it? He was taking you to be killed! You squirmed in his grasp, but it tightened. "Now now missy. No need for that. Lets not make your last few days painful. Lets keep it relaxed like earlier. To be honest, I didn't think genjustu worked on you. Miss 'chakra control'. Huh, who knew."

He was half right. You always knew when you were in a genjustu, you could tell from the chakra being released, but that didn't stop you from being inside the genjustu. With how tired you were after training and running, you must not have noticed. Now, thinking back, that forest space was too good to be true. Damnit! How could you fall for it! After all that warning to keep your guard up. Adding insult to injury, the damn man kept using the wrong pronouns. Have some class man.

You still your squirming, looking around the forest to try and get your surroundings. It was dark now. Maybe past supper...that would mean the others would be looking! If you could stall long enough, they might even be able to help. Now was no time to just let him carry you off. You gave another, hard squirm, trying to roll out of his arms. The assassin was clearly expecting that, and gave a snort. You had other plans, using that momentum of the roll away, you rolled hard the other direction. Throwing him off balance mid jump between branches. He slipped, falling from the tree canopy, and releasing you in the process. 

A groan left you as you hit the forest floor hard, rolling over onto your back. It was no time to focus. Even with the air knocked out of you, you ignored the struggle to breath and instead focused on slipping your hands under your hips and legs; pulling them in front of you. Now, now it was a fight. You jumped to your feet, pulling the gag from your mouth and focused your eyes on your kidnapper as he struggled to his feet. You took a deep breathe, calming your sore ribs as you prepared for the fight. You had no weapons, tied hands, and he had a sword. Not exactly an even match for him.

"Come on now missy. Don't make this an issue. The boss said he preferred you alive, but if I've got to cut something off to make that happen I will." he drew his sword, the blade winking with a blue, chakra like glint. That couldn't be good. You gave him a smart grin, raising your bound hands in front of your face. "If you don't fight with the intention of killing me, you've already lost."

"We'll see about that."

He ran forth, impatient. From that, you knew he was only hired help. The people who killed your clan, they knew everything about you. Including the patient fighting style, and the best ways to fight back. For example, the Dotan never made the first move. It was easier to dodge and counter than start the strike. Or perhaps to not use chakra in this fight. For that, is where you would win this. All you needed, was to get your hands over his heart. Then it was over.

You widened your stance, and side stepped the sword thrust; sliding your hands along the blade to cut your bonds free. In the same, flowing motion you grasped the top of the katana (avoiding the sharpened edge). It hummed with chakra, and with a deep breath, you took it in. Drawing it away from the blade and into your hands. You slid your hand up the blade and grabbed the hand holding it; forcing the chakra back in. Firing it back in his system, and the assassin dropped the sword with a short scream. "You! You bitch! What did you do!"

He swung wide with his fist, and you ducked; sliding in close til you were right next to him. The fight was over before it had started as you pressed your hands over his chest. There. That familiar, steady pulse of chakra. Moving under your fingers like liquid gold, and your own chakra slipped in. Grabbing onto him like claws, and pulling up. Dragging it out of his body and into your own. You let it flow from your hands all the way down to your feet, taking all of it as he withered under the feeling. Then, without even a breath of a second, you shoved it all in. Firing it all backwards, reversing the way his chakra flowed, and it was like his body had been struck by lightning; your own hands singed from the effort. Going tense and then collapsing on the ground in a series of seizures. 

You grabbed his shirt, yanking him up as you drove your foot into his stomach. The already seizing man coughed, vomiting on the ground next to himself. You growled out the words, "Who hired you?! Answer me!"

"I don't know! He was lik-ke some mob boss! They j-just pai-" A needle came out of nowhere, and you jumped out of the way before it touched you. The silver metal embedding itself in the assassin's neck, and he began to seize again; foaming at the mouth. 

"Shit! Don't you die you bastard!" you swore, pulling the needle out before looking around. You couldn't hear or sense anyone. Where had that needle come from? It couldn't be a ninja. Whomever it was had never used chakra before, that had to be why you couldn't sense him. Damnit! You looked down to the man as he finally stopped moving, his head lolling to the side as his life ended, and his chakra went out. A nasty way to go. 

"(Y/N)! Where are you?!" a voice called out. Then another. It sounded like...Tenzo...Shino...and Neji? Oh thank fuck they'd found you. You were so deep in this forest, you didn't even know how to get out anymore. You looked in their direction, "I'm over here! I'm okay!"

Neji was the first one there, launching himself from the trees and your old friend enveloped you in a tight hug. You squeaked at the pressure, confused as to why he buried his head in your shoulder. That wasn't like him. Even when you went on long missions, he never hugged you when you returned. This had been a far shorter time, and yet he held you as though he thought you dead. 

Shino and Tenzo arrived right after, both of them running up to check on you. You smoothed Neji's hair, and he pulled away; gripping your shoulders. "What were you thinking?! You knew it was dangerous, and yet you avoided every possible security measure!"

"If that beetle hadn't climbed back on your sleeve, we might not have found you at all." Shino chimed in, and you watched in shock as he pulled the beetle out of the crease of you sleeve. Clever insect. Tenzo nodded, grabbing your hand, "You might as well have gone rogue. No one knew where you'd run off too. Lucky indeed."

You pushed them off with a huff. "I know alright! I just...I needed to be alone, for once in this whole fucking mess. Look where that got me."

Tenzo looked at the foaming assassin, shaking his head. "Who poisoned him? A capsule?"

"No. Another person, but I couldn't feel them or where they went."

Neji activated his byakugan, searching the area, and when his face smoothed he gave a shake of his head. "Whoever it was, they're out of my range now. Did you manage to get anything out of him."

"A little." You admitted, before a slow, nervous panic set in. "He said. He was taking me to his boss, to be personally executed...to...execute the last Dotan."

The panic only heightened, when the three men refused to meet your gaze. There was...no way. You grabbed Neji's face, but he still refused to look at me. "Tell me what happened Neji. Why were you so worried?"

Silence. You looked to Tenzo, but the man turned back to picking up the assassin's body. You whirled to look at Shino, grabbing his hand, "Tell me she's okay. Tell me Grandmother is okay!"

"I'm sorry (y/n)." 

It was all the confirmation you needed. Without even knowing what direction you were going, you darted off. Running towards what you hoped was home. You saw a beetle fly a head of you, and you trusted in Shino's insect to lead you there. 

There was, no way she was dead. It was Grandmother. She was strong! And brave! She'd been matron for over six decades. She was a figher! Nothing could happen to her, not so soon after getting back. You...you hadn't even had a chance to tell her you loved her yet. She couldn't...

No. No! She was going to be there when you got back! Frowning and yelling at you for running off. Scolding you for being a selfish child, and never doing what your family needed. Then she'd make you a cup of tea, and put a salve on your burned hands, and everything would be okay. She was going to be waiting at the lantern lit gate for you.

You broke past the trees and onto the wall of the Dotan land. Jumping down from it to the floor, and you tore past the old, burnt houses and bloodied floors. Moving to main house. She'd be there. Grandmother had to be there. She'd be sitting on her porch with her pipe.

But the porch was empty. Kiba was sitting on it, and as he looked up to the sound of you appraoching, you could see the panic in his eyes. "(y/n)! Wait, don't go in yet!" 

But you pushed past him. Not the porch...okay, then she'd be waiting on the bench just inside.

The bench remained cold, unsat in. The kitchen making tea! But the hearth was unlit....Okay! It had to be she was eating a late dinner...but the table was empty, a meal gone cold in her place...

"Maybe she just forgot. She's upstairs sleeping!" You muttered to yourself, taking the stairs two at a time before Kiba could stop you (the poor man darting into the house and trying to catch you waist, but you darted past). 

She had to be there. Sitting in her bed, watching the sky as she waited for you to get home. Her elderly face illuminated by the porch lantern, and incense filling the room with smoke. She'd be there, and when you open that door, she would give you a big smile, and you could...you could tell her how much you loved her. 

She'd be there.

You yanked the sliding door so hard it fell off its slide, and you pushed it out of the way. Taking one step into the room before collapsing to your knees. You could feel hot, runny liquid seeping through the skirt and against your skin. The skirt she had so carefully picked for you, just this morning. "G-grannie?"

You fell onto your hands, crawling forward as the blood soaked into your palms; splashing up your forearms as you crawled towards the blood soaked mattress. Grandmother resting in the middle of it, but resting was the wrong word. The sheer size of the wound told you that this had been a long, slow death. Blood covered the walls and ceiling, stained the lantern that was still lit and cast a eerie glow in the room. Her face sat in juxtaposition to the tearing wound of her chest, eyes closed and a gentle frown on her face. As though she had simply fallen asleep. Perhaps she had been grateful for death to come. You were not.

The blood squelched under your weight as you climbed onto the bed, grabbing her body and pulling her against you. Holding her tight in one of the hugs you had missed so much. You couldn't even find a moment to cry, the disbelief of the moment sinking into your bones. She wasn't dead. This was sleep. She...was just sleeping. Right? Right?!? Please! Someone say she was just sleeping!! ANYONE!?!?

The room was silent, and Grandmother was lifeless. You cradled her head with one hand, holding her close. Your voice, a trembling whisper, "Please wake up grannie. For me? I love you so much, and I'm so sorry I never got to tell you that yet. I'm just a terrible grandchild for forgetting. So please...please wake up so I can tell you. I have to tell you!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Random question for you readers
> 
> If I were to write an akatsuki x reader series styled as Xing'an era (chinese dynasty) au. So, lots of romance, plotting, and drama with our favourite bad guys. This would be with another nb reader as well!


	5. Why Should I?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the horrors of Grandmother's death, the responsibility of the tasks ahead of you only weigh heavier. With an investigation on the run, and several suitors gone on a mission, what will you do with the time at hand?

"So please...please wake up so I can tell you. I have to tell you!"

"(y/n). That's enough, let her go."

You tried to shrug off the hand on your shoulder, not wanting to leave. You had to wait til she woke up again, and then it would be okay again. If you left, than you might miss her! Kiba persisted, wrapping an arm around your waist while using his other hand to try and release your grasp on the body. No, no! You couldn't lose her! Not her too! It can't be just you left. Your tone cracked, fighting back the tears and the reality as he dragged you away. "Kiba stop it! Let me go! She needs me!"

"She's gone (y/n), its over." Kiba whispered, pulling you back to him and you immediately curled your arms around his shoulders. Burying your face in the warmth of his neck, and the tears broke through. Your legs giving out from under you as the situation sunk in, and Kiba was the one holding your weight as you cried. Gross, wet sobs, that made your whole body shake. He held you up through all of it, lowering you both to the floor, his hands tight against your back. It couldn't be. She couldn't be dead, it just...not another one. Not again. Your voice rose in its hysterics, "Why? Why is it just me?!"

Kiba didn't say anything, you didn't expect him to. Kiba didn't have to answer for the universe's decisions to strip everything and everyone from you. To leave you alone in a big house with nothing but those damned blood stained floors and the ghosts that haunted the back of your mind. Telling you everything you had to carry now. The remaining Dotan. The last Dotan. The head of the clan, and its only hope. 

It was all on you. 

"L-lady Tsunade!" Kiba interrupted your spiraling thoughts, and you looked up to see her walking into the room. Shikamaru following right after her, covering his mouth as he took in the butchery before him; you didn't dare look behind you anymore. You didn't want to remember whatever it was on the bed, for it was certainly not the memory you wanted to hold of Grandmother. 

Kiba slowly released you, keeping an arm around your waist; waiting to see anymore tears, but you felt only hollow now. Watching the Lady Tsunade's shadow as it moved against the wall. Shikamaru hesitated, his breathing halted, before he took several steps forward and joined you and Kiba on your knees. The usually stoic man wrapping his arms around you in a tight hug, "I understand."

It was all you needed to start crying again. He understood. He knew the pain of losing someone so close to you. Someone you looked up to and studied under, and it was a pain that never really left. Even Shikamaru held a distinct tremble to his voice as he said it. This was a sorrow that would follow you, a lingering memory. Kiba tightened his hold, and Shikamaru held you. Keeping you safe while you let the waves of unforgivable loneliness wash through you. 

It was just you.

"Shikamaru report. How did this happen? We have two ANBU on the estate, and the five of you nearby!" Tsunade snapped, and Shikamaru looked up. Kiba rubbed your spine a few times as you calmed your breath, looking to the hokage. Shikamaru cleared his throat, about to answer when you interrupted him with your own explanation. "Its my fault. I dodged my escort. Tenzo would have reported back, and the others went looking for me while Shikamaru got you. That left only Kiba and Itachi, who wouldn't have noticed a silent assassin from the other side of the estate. Why would they? They were worried about me?"

"You did what?!" she snapped, "You know the only reason we put Tenzo with you was for the sake of your own safety! If you hadn't been playing hookie this might not have happened at all!"

She was right, and you hated that. If you had stayed in range, and not gotten attacked, then you would all have been safely within range of Grandmother. You looked up sharply when there was a loud thump on the patio and Tenzo now on the rail. He bowed his head, looking up to Lady Tsunade. "Lady Hokage. We were unable to secure the assassin that attacked the Dotan head, and no information was gained off the body of the man who attacked (y/n). This appears to have been a planned attack."

"Damnit! We had everything in place til you decided to run off!" she swore, looking ready to pull out her hair and then pull your hair in turn. "Do you not realize how valuable your kekkei genkai is? That's the whole reason we've been protecting you for years. So that you could rebuild and support this village! That's it, we can't take anymore risks! You are not to leave this estate under any circumstances! I don't care if its on fire, you are staying here until there is a ring on your finger and a child in your stomach! Do I make myself clear?!"

You'd never seen the old hokage snap like that, but perhaps Tsunade hadn't been chosen because of her patience. You moved closer to Kiba as she yelled, and he pulled you tighter against him. She had laid it bare. This was your fault, you were stuck on this blood filled estate, and your freedom came at the cost of a child. Was this the anger and expectation Grandmother had kept from you. Letting you live a carefree life looking after Princess Hana? Now, it was all on you. Tsunade continued yelling at everyone in the room. Instructing Tenzo to remove Grandmother's body, and then yelling at Iku to prepare the funeral for tomorrow. She stormed to the door, pausing only once to yell at you again, "And you! You better prepare the Dotan ceremony to become the head of your clan."

"W-what about the funeral?" you asked quietly, getting to your feet; legs shaking. Tsunade's brow furrowed and the venom dripped from her words. "The burial site isn't on your estate, so you will not be attendance. You. Are not leaving this estate! Tenzo!"

"Yes ma'am?"

"If they try, lock them in the marriage home. You and Iku are to watch them constantly."

With her jailing words, the hokage left. Leaving you all in the blood filled room, the rest of your suitors arriving to the space. You sank back to your knees, the wet tatami mats pushing more blood against your legs as Tenzo repeated the hokage's instructions. You were a damn prisoner in your own home, and the men to marry your jail keepers.

"Come on, you're covered in blood. We'll get a bath run for you." Kiba muttered, and before you could move to nod, he swept you up in his arms. You didn't have the energy to even protest that. Left to your shock as he carried you from the main house. Back to yet another, once bloody home. Itachi was waiting at the door, holding the frame lightly as he listened for your approach. You could hear Kiba's smile, trying to keep the mood relaxed, "Hey Itachi. Get the bath running for them okay?"

The Uchiha nodded, disappearing back inside the house. Neji ran in ahead of you all, but you didn't know what his goal was. It was hard to care either. You just let the rocking motion of Kiba's arms relax you as he carried you inside and then up the stairs. The dark walls seemed to stretch forever onward, and then, you were in the bathroom. Itachi kneeling next to it, making ripples in the water with his hand. "I smell blood. Were they hurt?"

"Not their blood." Kiba mumbled gently putting you down on the counter. The two men didn't move. Not sure if they were suppose to leave you alone, or to keep you company at the worst point. You cleared your throat, "I don't...want to be alone."

That was enough for the two of them, and Kiba gave a brave smile, kneeling down to take off each sandal and tossing them into the trash "Ya ya we're not going anywhere. Here, lets get the wet clothes off." 

Itachi nodded, standing up from the water and he gently grasped your hand, helping you stand. With the other hand, he felt around your waist til he found the tie of your skirt, and began to work the knot free. Some part of you knew you should feel embarrassed to be slowly stripped by an ex-criminal and a childhood friend, but it was hard to care about anything anymore. Why did it matter? Your family was dead and the remainder of your life was dictated to this place and the future children of your clan.

The skirt slipped off to the ground, and Kiba untied the knot of the under robe; slipping it past your shoulders and under Itachi's arm to let that fall to the floor as well. The only sound in the room was the quiet drip of blood off your skin. Both of the shinobi holding their breath, and Kiba was tactfully trying to look anywhere but your naked skin; Itachi didn't bother. Instead of dwelling on it, they helped you into the tub. The water quickly turning pink as it lapped at your body. The warmth was enough to make you let out a loud sob. Just the one, shuddering out of your tired chest. 

A knock on the door made you look up, and Neji walked in with a cup of tea in hand. Walking past the two, he sat on the edge of the tub and held it out for you. You shook your head, not ready to expend the effort to even hold a cup of tea. Neji shook his head, and tilted the cup at your lips, "You need something. You've been gone all day without eating. You need to take care of yourself."

"Why should I? It doesn't matter anymore." you sighed out, pushing the tea away and curling your knees to your chest. You just felt tired. Done. There was no point.. Why should you do anything? Neji growled, throwing the cup out of the door, "I understand that you're hurting, but do you think the late Lady Dotan would want you to neglect yourself?"

"N-no..." You hated to admit he had a point. Neji grabbed a sponge, and rubbed the blood off your face in slow, circular patterns. "We'll take it one day at a time, and slowly it will get easier. We're all here for you while you heal. That's what friends are for."

"Ya! We've got your back (y/n)! I can take care of the dogs, Shino can cook, we've all got talents we can do to make things easier on you!" Kiba chimed in, and Itachi gave a nod, smiling faintly. You took a deep breathe, and did your best to smile. Of all things, at least you had your friends with you in this house arrest situation. Neji continued to rub the blood off your skin, the water getting darker and darker until you finally felt clean of the death. Without a moment of hesitation, Neji hoisted you out of the tub, and took you out of the bathroom; no matter that you were leaving a trail of water behind you. He pressed a gentle kiss to your forehead as he walked you to his room, "I'm going on a mission. Myself and Shikamaru. It'll be safer to sleep in one of the others room, in case we've been watched without our knowledge. They could know where you sleep. Better if there is someone with you."

"You're leaving? When?" you asked softly, grabbing the blanket off his bed as he put you down and curling it over your shoulders. Keeping out the evening cold with the stitched wool and the scent of lavender. Neji fished around in his belongings and tossed you a loose white robe. "An escort mission. We're leaving after you complete the ceremony to take over your clan..."

He looked over to you, taking the low ponytail out of his hair, "I'm going to miss having you around again. Though this mission should only take a few weeks, not six years."

"You missed me?" you whispered, pulling the robe onto your shoulders and tying it closed; it was still slightly too big, slipping down your shoulders. Neji gave a soft chuckle, but nodded, "I did. The whole village was way too loud without you there. A lot happened, and every time I came home I thought about where you were. If you were okay. If I was going to see you again. When I heard you were coming home...and that you were going to get married. I had to be there. I had to see you."

Your mouth dropped open lightly, watching the way he gazed at you. Like you were descended moon, glowing in the low light. A longing, loving gaze that you had never known from him before. You didn't even know what to say. While he spent years thinking about you, you had been focused on your work. Enjoying the freedom of your mission. Not, thinking of him. It felt so unfair to not be able to reciprocate his feeling right then and there, but you would not lie to him either. "Neji...I.."

"You don't need to return my thoughts (y/n). We have all the time in the world, and I'm grateful to spend it with you." he smiled, shrugging off his shirt and stepping towards the bed. You couldn't help but stare, the moonlight flickering over the toned and pale skin of his torso. Damn that smirk when he caught you, sliding next to you in the bed. "You should get some sleep. Tenzo is watching the estate, and I'll keep you safe here."

"Alright...just..." you looked away, lying down onto the bed. Neji gently tilted your gaze back to his, "Out with it (y/n)."

"Promise me you'll be careful on your mission. I don't want to lose anyone else."

"I promise. Try not to forget me while I'm gone."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A shorter, but softer piece. Hope that's alright  
> Thanks for all the support on my new fanfic idea! I hope to start it soon!


	6. A Promise to Keep

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After being forced to miss their grandmother's funeral, (Y/N) takes over leadership of their clan. Two of the suitors head off on a mission, leaving the other three time to get to know (Y/N) better.

The sun rose the next morn, and yet as your eyes fluttered open, it still felt like you rested within a dream. The morning was too beautiful. Petals fluttering past the open window as golden light spilled into the room and its warm walls. Blankets softer than silk, and the warmth of Shino curled up next to you; still sleeping without a care in the world, a butterfly gently resting on his nose. Under Neji's advice, you were to always be accompanied, even inside, lest the untraceable assassin return to try and harm you. Shino was the calmest choice to you, and the least likely to get any ideas; this night proved you right as he had barely moved, straight as a board with at least a foot between you two.

You looked to the window again, frowning at the signing birds and the cool wind. It was all too beautiful. The day should have raged with storms and lightning, shaking the entire village to mimic the sobbing pain still clutching at you. Grandmother was dead, and you were alone. Nothing should be beautiful anymore. Yet, the sun continued to rise, and a petal floated into the room to brush past your cheek. You caught it, running your fingers against the fading petal and its velvet texture. 

"You should still be sleeping. Its going to be a long day." Shino mumbled, his breathe sending the butterfly to float away from his nose and up and out the window. You snapped your gaze to him, not recognizing he had awoken, and the insect shinobi gave a soft smile at your startled face. He sat up, running a hand into the spiky hair; somehow he'd managed to sleep with those goggles on and seemed the same as always, not a moment changed. "You barely slept at all."

"Can you blame me?" you mumbled, rubbing the back of your neck and massaging the sore edge from it. 

"I suppose not, come on lets get ready to wave off the funeral parade." Shino muttered, not wanting to get too deep into the conversation. He could probably tell from the way your shoulders tensed, that the ban from your own grandmother's funeral still stung. A slight you would not soon forgive the Lady Tsunade for creating. 

You took Shino's hand as he stood, gathering tight the falls of robe around you as the wind billowed in. Shino quickly closed the window, picking up his jacket from the floor in the same motion. You couldn't help but admire his movement. A certain fluidity, like he had decided every step in advanced before finally coming to stop. You imagined his eyes constantly examining every surface as he moved, and for a moment, wondered what colour they were. Shino looked up as he finished doing the last clasp on his jacket, "You're staring (y/n). Go get dressed."

"Oh, crap sorry." you mumbled, darting out of the room and back to your own. Waiting, already folded on the bed was the dreaded white fabric of mourning. At least it was simple. Nothing fancy or overdone. No dramatic headpieces or shiny jewelry. Just a kimono, and all the death that carried with it. At least you didn't need help doing this up, tying the simple belt and smoothing the skirt. That was it, hair down, feet in simple sandals. Grandmother wasn't here to enforce the tradition for the ceremony later. Part of you already missed that; there was a lot you would miss in the future.

"Hey, (y/n)? You ready to wave the parade off?" Kiba called, knocking lightly on the sliding door to get your attention. You looked up, smoothing the skirt one more time before opening the door. Kiba was dressed in the same, plain white clothing. The only smack of colour was the carefully marked cheeks and he gave you a wry smile; trying to bring some happiness back into the room. He held out a hand, and you took it, relying on the strength of his grasp for a moment. "I'm ready."

"Its pretty rough, but Lady Tsunade just wants to keep you safe." Kiba mumbled, pulling you down the hall with a gentle encouragement. "Its not fair, but I don't wanna see you get hurt anymore than anyone else does. Its not coincidence that the attacks are happening right around the same time as this whole proposal thing."

You knew he was right, but it didn't make any of this easier. In part, this was your fault. If you hadn't led to the forces being spread so thin, then they would have been there to protect you and Grandmother. That weighed heavier than Tsunade's anger, perhaps you deserved this imprisonment. Not there was anyone left to lose. 

Maybe Kiba read your thoughts on your face, or the way you tightly clung to his hand, or maybe just that extra sense his more animal like qualities gifted him. Regardless of how, the man stopped in the hall and pulled you forward into a hug. Wrapping his arms tightly around you until all you could sense was the feral beat of his chakra and the strong scent of sweat and fur that clung to his skin. It was warmth and strength and home; everything you felt empty of. You couldn't help the few stray tears falling down your cheeks as he held you, quick to wrap your arms around him and cling to the fabric of his back.

"Its alright, let it out now so you can be strong later." he hummed, his rough voice reverberating in his chest and you gave another, shuddering sob. "T-this is my fault. I d-didn't mean for this to happen."

"i know lamb, I know. Its not your fault, just let it go." he soothed, pulling back just enough to wipe the tears clean, "Now we need to get going. Be strong for her okay? She wouldn't want to see you cry."

You gave another, short sob; letting Kiba run his hand against your cheek. He waited patiently, saying nothing but encouraging you to breathe. As the last tear fell, your breathing calm, you nodded. "I'm ready. Lets face this together."

"We'll all be here for you." Kiba soothed, giving a brave smile as you both continued down the stairs. The rest of the men were already waiting for you there, each one as plain and pale as you were. No one smiled like Kiba did, keeping the mood light as he walked by your side. The rest following out the door as you waited for the funeral parade to walk by. 

There was no spectacle. No mourners. No family members to escort the small casket as it was led out of the matron's home. Only a few of her old friends and the hokage herself. There was no one left to mourn this clan, not even the remaining child to go and attend the funeral. Tsunade refused to meet your gaze as she walked past, and you felt Kiba grab your curling fist; holding you in place so as not to cause any trouble. You wouldn't have, but you were grateful for the support of his hand. Staring blank faced and strong as they carried her body away. Just as Grandmother would want it, never to break tradition. 

You could still remember the long parade of caskets so many years ago. You, still a child. Barely holding back tears as all manner of family was carted away in box after box; Grandmother looked made of stone. From the start of the funeral to the point of putting them in the ground. She would have expected the same sternness from you now as she had held back then. To be unmovable. 

The doors of the clan estate walls swung shut, and you lost site of the small funeral parade. Leaving nothing but you and the five men Grandmother had picked for you. To continue as though nothing had occured, and yet everything had changed. You gently pulled your hand free of Kiba's and began the short walk to the shrine that had been built on site. A way to communicate with family, without travelling all the way to the grave. "Lets get this ceremony over with."

There was to be no dramatic ceremony, no toasts or cheers. There was no one but you to take on the family name and lead, and for that you only would ask for the dead's blessing. At least, it would be the simplest of ceremonies. Not like when your father became head for a short time. Uncles, aunts, and cousins all objecting for their right to lead the clan. Many didn't want to, but there was an expectation to do so. There was no one to object, no one to fight you. Only a small promise to serve the clan well, and do your best to continue it. Whatever that would cost.

It was a small shrine. Sitting in front of a small peach tree, a branch that had been cut from the original under which you family was buried. Names and offerings rested upon the stone altar, and your Grandmother's picture now rested upon the shrine as well. Looking as stern and disapproving as always, it was a near comforting site. 

You knelt down in front of the shrine, feeling the presence of your friends and companions behind you as you began a quiet prayer. Hoping that the dead rested, and were no longer troubled by worldly affairs. Looking up, you saw all the deceased pictures and names looking down upon you. Every generation, every name and history was remembered here, and now you would carry it. To have been gone so long, and now to take up the mantle of your entire home, were you ready?

You would have to be. There was no other option now. 

"I humbly beseech my clan, to accept me as the next head. Guide me to lead it honourable, fairly, and with strength."

That was it. There was no objection. The peach tree didn't sway, not angry ghosts appeared to scold you. In a matter of seconds, you were now the leader of your clan. Of yourself in truth. You didn't feel any different. No magical clap of energy that instilled you with a new power. It was just you. Shino stepped forward, sliding a hand under your elbow to help you stand. You found strength in his grasp, in a way different than Kiba. The way standing upon an empty cliff made you feel strong. The cold, numbing out everything else and all you could do was focus on his face for a moment. Stern and solid. Unshakable, even now. 

Shikamaru ran a hand against his hair, giving a groan, "Come on Neji, we've gotta go. This is gonna be a drag."

"Do you have to leave right now? We just finished up?" Kiba protested, giving the guys what you could only call a disappointed look. Neji sighed, crossing his arms, "Tsunade wanted us to leave immediately after observing. Can't say too much what its for, but we have to get going. I'm sorry (y/n). I would stay if I could."

"I know....getting going you two, and come back safe. There's been enough death." you mumbled, giving a soft bow of your head as they both darted off; not without Neji giving you a long look. Parting was always a sweet sorrow. You let them leave, unmoving as you felt Shino slide a hand across you waist, holding you steady; a pressure you didn't know you needed, only now noticing the way the wind made you sway. 

It was now you, Shino, Kiba, and Itachi. Two very quiet men, and one who could talk for hours. It would be an interesting time until the others got back. If Grandmother was here, she would tell you that this was an opportunity to get to know them better, while the amount of people was smaller. No doubt Tsunade would arrange one event or another for you all to attend.

"Lets go in and eat, you slept pretty late, must be starving." Shino hummed, guiding you away from the tree when the two had disappeared from site. Kiba darted forward, whistling and Akumaru came charging out with your new puppy on its back. Chasing after the man with playful barks. Itachi stayed back to walk with you two, "A few people came by and left food, we brought everything in so we won't have to cook at least."

"Oh good, I've never been great at the cooking thing. Where's Choji when you need him?" you laughed softly, but were greeted only by silence. Right, not great senses of humour there. Itachi walked in first, opening the door and Shino walked in after him. You paused on the door step, watching Kiba play in the yard with the dogs. An almost domesticate scene, and he paused long enough to give you a boyish smile; promptly ruined as he was tackled by Akumaru. You gave a laugh, nearly missing Tenzo as he appeared next to you.

"You were talking in your sleep." he mumbled, biting into a peach as he watched the same sight as you. 

"Was I? Anything interesting?" you mumbled, looking up to him as he spoke; staring at the mask with the same curiosuity as before. Tenzo nodded, "Mainly about your family, didn't seem like you were sleeping well."

In a quick motion, he sunk to one knee, refusing to look up at you. You grabbed his arm, trying to pull him up but he didn't budge. "I have to apologize. Its my fault you were hurt, and that your grandmother died. Please forgive me for failing."

"You didn't fail anything Tenzo, please get up." you muttered, pulling once more and the ANBU rose to his feet. There was a hesitation in his hand but he reached out to push hair back from your cheek and tuck it behind your ear. You could feel his eyes watching you, and you couldn't look away for a suspended moment. "I promise, I won't let that happen again."

"Hey (y/n)! What's going on? Another sighting?" Kiba called out from the yard, and Tenzo pulled away; giving a wave as he shook his head, "Nothing has been reported. Just checking in on the family head. Keep an eye on them."

Without another word, or even a look to you, he vanished back into the trees. Kiba came dancing up, carrying the puppy on his head as he had once do with Akumaru when he was far smaller. "Come on, lets go eat. I saw a chicken in there, and I'm willing to wrestle the guys for it."

"You'll have to fight me for the chicken." you gave a weak smile, following in after him to see the other two setting out the heated food on the table. 

It was going to be an interesting week.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, life got in the way as it does; pandemics, ended my engagement, brother died, its a lot


	7. The Unseen Quiet

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> With your closet friends away on the mission, it gives you a chance to get to know the others

You wanted to say the house felt oddly quiet. There was no heavy wind to shake the wooden beams, or the hum of steps and voices. Yet, it had always been that quiet here. Ghosts wandering, ever silent and unseen in the halls as moving memories. Quiet was the natural state of abandoned homes and forgotten pasts. Maybe that was the best part of having the guys here. The quiet noise they created. Kiba's heavy steps, the slight buzz that followed Shino's breathe, and even the slide of Itachi's fingers across the wooden beams as he counted them to find his way around. They broke the building silence in their own, quiet way.

"So what do we do now?" Kiba muttered, looking up from Akumaru as he followed you into the home. You looked over your shoulder to him, giving a tired smile, "I'm not sure, not exactly allowed to leave the estate as of now."

You looked around the old, newly furnished room you were borrowing for this ridiculous arrangement. The unfamiliarity and the bloody walls. The history it carried even when the others didn't know it. You paused in your walking, not turning to view them as you spoke to the others. "Actually, I'll need your help. I want to move our stuff into the main house."

"Are you sure that's a good idea-" Itachi began, but you interrupted with a quick cough, "I'm the head of this family now, and I would at least like to be in a familiar place for it. Please."

Perhaps the words had come out quite sharply, but it left no one for room with an argument. You didn't want one. You just wanted to be in the room you had grown up in, surrounded by a place of mostly good memories. You'd seal off Grandma's room though, there were no good memories left there. You picked up the first thing you could find, an old, ceramic vase; cracked several times and repaired with gold til it shone like broken heavenly skin. A family piece, you were the reason for at least one of those cracks being there. Having knocked it over when running down a hall you were told not to run in. 

Starting for the door, a pale hand curled around you arm and you looked up to Itachi. And up. Damn he was tall, and those pale, red eyes seemed to see everything despite their blinding weakness as he stared into you. You readied for an argument, some protest about making a rash action in grief. Instead, he gave a firm nod, "Okay. Which room do you want us moving too?"

You paused, blinking at him for a moment before giving brief instructions for where everyone could go. And you? You took your parent's old room on the top floor, with the rooms surrounding it and the one below it belonging to these...guests? Friends? Suitors? It was hard to say, perhaps they filled a weird middle space of all three. With your words, they were already helping you move things. Even Tenzo started to help when he saw what you were all up too. Within two hours, everything had been moved back. Whether that made you fast movers, or merely said you had few things it was hard to say, but the empty spaces in your room seemed to confirm the latter. 

It was less lonely here. Even in a bigger place, you knew the walls better. The feel of the tatami mats beneath your feet. You even new the scratch marks by the door, where you had carved your name into the wooden beam. When your dad had asked you why, you'd said it was because one day you'd be in charge, and this room was yours! You were just marking your place for he future. A prediction of sorts, yet a rather sick one. If you had known this was the result of how you would become a leader, you'd have kept your mouth shut. But, now it was yours, and the family name was yours. 

Is it cliche to say you'd give it all up to have them back?

"Hey, (Y/n), come on, you need to eat." Itachi mumbled from the door frame, only now realizing you were still standing in the middle of the room holding the remaining box of packed clothes. The rest of the room only had a few boxes in it and the dusty, unkempt bed that once belonged to your parents. Grandmother had never allowed you in here, you thought it was because she was the family head, not that she had left near identical to how it has been when your parents died. Even the years old orchid pot was still there, with dirt and dust gathered around the now crumbled flower petals. 

Without any form of delicacy, you dropped the last box to the ground and gave Itachi a nod. He grasped your hand, and almost pulled away until he spoke; a weak, near embarrassed tone "I don't know the house well, I just need to get my bearings."

Oh. Right. New place, he was more likely to walk into a wall than a door. So you squeezed his hand gently, "Course. Come on, the kitchen is nicer, if a bit old fashioned. Hope you're all down for steam buns."

Itachi gave a small nod, and you both made your way down the flights of stairs. Taking your time slowly so that he could count and memorize the path he was taking. By the time you made it to the kitchen, you could hear the faint counting under his breathe and then he let go of your arm just as he walked in. Removing the evidence he had needed help at all as you both came into view of the Shino and Kiba. Kiba currently shifting through the cupboards as he looked for something to eat. He gave you that wide grin, "Finally, do you need groceries? All I'm finding is bags of rice, seaweed, etc. No snacks anywhere."

"Grandmother wasn't exactly a chip person, but I can make something up out of this. Had to do my own cooking every now and then. You guys now how to make steam buns?"

The lack of response and eye contact told you all you needed to know and you pointed to the table; a grin finally slipping onto your face for the first time that day. "Well I think we should change that. Sit down, I'll show you the ropes."

As they got comfy, you pulled out the ingredients for dough, knowing there would still be filling for the buns in the cooler. You divided up the ingredients between the four of you and quickly took a seat next to Itachi. You started adding the ingredients together, mixing them into dough paste before dumping it onto the table. "Now, kneading dough is very important, just follow my lead."

The rest of the day was filled with light laughs and smiles. Plenty of loose flour clinging to your cheeks, as you kneaded out the dough, everyone following your example to a T. Well, Kiba was following along until Akumaru snatched his dough pile off the table and ran off with it. The rest of you laughing as he chased the dog around the kitchen trying to get it back. Itachi did his best as well, but you're pretty sure he had folded his dough enough that it was going to be more of a pastry then a bun. Only Shino seemed to be following along perfectly, and you had yet to see an insect get accidentally kneaded into the dough thank goodness. It left you all with six, perfectly cooked buns, three that had sunken from their labours, and a happy Akumaru as he chewed on the dough he stole from Kiba. 

"Oh these are amazing!" Kiba grinned snatching one right off the stove top and giving quick breathes around the burning hot bun as he tried to cool it in his mouth. You smile, cutting yours in half to try and let it cool, "Thank you. My grandma taught me how to make these. The right way, as she put it. None of that remade dough or filling." you laughed softly, a soft pang in your heart as you ate to her memory now. The room grew quieter as the awkward moment sunk in, and you couldn't find the heart to finish the bun. Setting it down on the table with a sigh. "I'm gonna get ready for bed. Think there's been enough going on today, I could use the extra sleep today."

You heard the quiet agreements as you took the stairs back up. Closing the door with a silent click behind you to look into the empty, unpacked room. Maybe..that's what you needed to do. Unpack. Its not like you were going anywhere. Not anymore. You wondered how long Tsunade would keep you here. Til marriage? Til your first child? Second? Til they were full grown and married. When would your life be your own again. With no end in sight on the world's shittiest mission, you started to unpack. Folding day clothes and pajamas, and hanging up the more traditional clothes that Grandmother had packed for you as well. Only a few keepsakes were in the boxes; pictures, a few gifts and empty cookie containers from people you had helped and your headband. For the past few years, you hadn't been allowed to wear it. They couldn't let people know that the princess had a ninja to guard her the entire time. No you were the pretence of a friend for the public, and this headband had been buried deep in your apartment until the day you moved back. No reason to wear it now either. 

Grasping the headband, you walked to the balcony. Looking out over the empty courtyard as you gripped the metal plate in your hand. A dark figure moved across the field, and you almost panicked, until your recognized the Uchiha symbol stitched onto the back of his jacket. Itachi. He walked carefully, avoiding the roots of the peach tree as he walked the small family shrine. What was he up too? He moved deliberately, and then knelt in front of the shrine. You could just barely see what he put down, but you could still see it. A small steamed bun, just like grandma had show you. With what must have been a prayer, he stayed there a moment before pulling away. Looking up to your balcony for just a moment before pulling away.

Whether he saw you or not, he was thinking of you. In a way, they all were. You weren't alone in this place anymore, and they filled it with a gentle hum. For however long you were kept here, whomever you stayed with, at least, you weren't alone anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the long wait, I'm just getting back into rhythm

**Author's Note:**

> Let me know what you think! Or if you have any ideas for new fics!


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